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Parents concerned about wayward teen

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: We are at loss as how to deal with our 17-year-old son (an only child).

He has always pushed the boundaries. Teachers have long identified him as bright but unmotivated. But recently his behavior has gotten much worse.

He usually makes it to school. He has a part-time food service job, but other than that he spends most of his time in his room with the door locked.

He frequently argues with us, refuses to help at home, and needs multiple prompts to get to school or work. He is failing all of his classes.

He is smoking marijuana at home (both in the morning and before going to work). We have tried mightily to stop this. Recently, after getting upset, he started breaking things and came very close to getting physical with his father.

I feel like his recent behavior is because he doesn't have a goal for his life.

 

We talk to him about options: getting a GED, taking classes at the community college, or just working full-time.

When he won't go to therapy, his father and I go instead.

Because he seems so unhappy at home, we have asked him to consider living elsewhere for a while (boarding school, grandparents out of state, or even a friend's house). We have taken away privileges and even tried a few bribes. Nothing seems to work. He seems miserable, and we are too.

Where do we go from here?

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