Life Advice


Health & Spirit

Sometimes a 'thank you' is a great gift

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My young-adult daughter and her partner have lived together for four years. They live 300 miles away.

I am very fond of my daughter's partner and send her a birthday gift each year.

I have never received a thank you. I'm flexible on the format -- a text would be fine with me, however ... nothing.

This year I asked my daughter if her girlfriend had received the gift, but that didn't feel right, either. In the future, should I text her girlfriend and ask her directly? Should I give up on this expectation and assume the gifts are received?

The tracking number lets me know it arrived on their front porch. Of course, I'd like to hear that I selected a gift that was appreciated, but I really want to know if she got it.

I've sent gifts to children knowing it was up to their parents as to whether I received a thank you. When sending a gift to an adult, my expectations are that there'd be some acknowledgment.

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Amy, are thank-you's and/or acknowledgements passé?

-- Did You Get It?

Dear Did You: A "thank you" never goes out of style.

And I would say that over four years' time, a texted acknowledgment from an adult that a gift was received should be considered the minimum investment toward receiving a gift the following year.


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