Life Advice

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Adult education class leads to childish behavior

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

If the student refuses to adjust their behavior, you should seek counsel from an administrator regarding next steps.

Dear Amy: My husband of almost 27 years survived quintuple bypass surgery last year, and was able to return to work three months later.

His doctors insisted that he give up a lifelong habit of using smokeless tobacco. With my help, he managed to quit. He still misses this habit and said he would do it if it weren't for my insistence that he stay off it.

To replace the tobacco, he has begun drinking. The doctors say he can drink in moderation -- at most, two beers per day. At first, this was all he drank, but now, especially on the weekends, he drinks in excess of nine or 10 beers at a time.

I know this is not good for him and could, in fact, be deadly, but if I mention it I am nagging. He says things like, "I need one little vice" or "one little pleasure."

This makes me feel very scared, and sad, to think that all the enjoyment he gets out of life now is to drink.

 

He's alive. He has a job that he loves and a wonderful family. I cannot discuss this with our children or his mother because it would only hurt them. They do not know about his excessive drinking.

I can't deal with it any longer. What should I do? I believe his drinking is going to put him in the grave.

-- Worried Sick

Dear Worried: Al-anon meetings could be very helpful for you. There, you could unleash this secret you're holding by talking with other people whose lives are also affected by a loved one's drinking.

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