Grandparents want alone-time with the grandkids
While I understand that the important memories are the ones I carry with me, I can't help but feel incredibly hurt.
I texted my cousin asking to be added back, but so far I have heard nothing. I don't want to bother my aunt with this because she is dealing with her own grief right now, and I don't want to strain my relationship with her.
Should I cut my losses and try to move on from here? Are there options I am missing?
-- Upset
Dear Upset: If your cousin controls your late uncle's Facebook page, I don't think there is any way to be added back without her approving it. She sounds petty and punitive. Stay in touch with your aunt, but don't ask her to intervene.
I hope you will anchor now to the laudable and loving relationship you had with your uncle, and let these positive memories sustain you. This might be the best you can do.
Dear Amy: Regarding how to address in-laws, before I married, my future mother-in-law addressed the name issue by saying, "If your parents weren't alive I'd hope you would call us "Mom and Dad," but since they are, it would be disrespectful for us to expect you to call us anything but Sue and Bob."
I was always grateful for her to have solved this dilemma for me before it even became an issue.
-- Grateful DIL
Dear Grateful: This is ideal.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
