Life Advice


Health & Spirit

Husband wants wife to shed some weight

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am 65-years-old.

I moved away from family and friends 25 years ago, and now I make annual visits to my hometown, which include renting a car and driving four to five hours to see my best friend, "Freddie," from childhood.

When we have house guests at my home, we all shuffle so that our guests will have their own room and bathroom. Sometimes the young adults will willingly sleep on the couch if there is no more bed space.

So when discussing my yearly visit, Freddie just informed me that her grown children (20-somethings with their own apartments) will be home for the weekend. Thus, I would have to vacate the daughter's room and sleep on an air bed on the floor.

I love my friend. But I fly across the country, rent the car, make the drive, take them out to dinner, buy groceries, and bring presents.

Is it too much to ask her kids to maybe sleep on the air bed for the night? I want to see them, too, but I don't want to sleep on the floor.

What do you think?

-- Upset

Dear Upset: Yes, the younger people should sleep on the floor. Being occasionally displaced is part of the service that great hosts are happy to provide, and parents should let their children know that older guests will be accommodated and made comfortable.

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But for the price of a dinner out, groceries, and gifts for the household, you could probably afford to stay in a nearby motel for the night. Given your friend's openness about her intentions during your annual visit, this might be the best option for you.

Dear Amy: The letter from "Aussie" concerned me. This guy admitted that he had basically lied to a woman he had met on Tinder. He had to leave the USA and return to Australia for reasons of an expiring visa, and yet he told her he was going home on vacation!

You started your response by telling him, "Don't lie," but then you provided a lie for him to use, by suggesting that he could "paper over" his absence by saying that once he had returned home, he realized he had visa trouble.

I am very concerned by the prospect of an advice-giver with many readers giving this conflicting advice.

-- Upset

Dear Upset: Duly noted. Yes, "Don't lie" is always the best advice. In this instance, I succumbed to the temptation to provide a half-truth, which is also, I realize, a half-lie.


(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)



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