Reunion brings on fantasy and possible forgiveness
Dear Jack: When you refer to "Jill" as your fairy tale soul mate and the most beautiful woman in a very large state, you run the risk of disrespecting your spouse, who is presumably not chopped liver. Jill's spouse might also take exception to this.
I sense a fantasy taking shape here, and I hope you can marshal your inner resources to keep yourself in check, in order to remain respectful to all parties.
No. A public event in front of long-lost friends and family members is not the place to proffer a 45-year-old apology. If you have the opportunity to speak with Jill privately at this event, or can reach out to her afterward, you should tell her that you've always felt ashamed of your behavior that night. Tell her you hope she would be willing to forgive you.
Dear Amy: I am a 52-year-old guy with a twin sister. Our birthday is arriving soon.
On our 40th birthday, I was informed by her previous husband that he was throwing a surprise birthday party for my sister.
My ex-wife and I went to this party to support her. However, I felt really left out, especially when the cake came out that said "Happy Birthday, [her name only]."
There was also a table covered with cards and presents from friends and family for her.
Other folks at the party realized very quickly that it was my birthday too, and struggled with the reasoning as to why I wasn't included.
This happened again on our 50th birthday, where her current husband and my 20-something niece did the same thing.
I didn't go to that party and derided my family for once again not standing up and saying that this was hurtful to me.