ArcaMax

-- Upset Wife

Dear Upset: Your husband either doesn't realize or doesn't care that his behavior on Facebook can damage his relationships and his reputation. Saying, "It's only Facebook" is discounting the megaphone's role in a person's offensive broadcasts. It is extremely naive not to realize the power of this public bulletin board, where posts, comments, photos and memes can follow you around forever.

If your husband's business relies on keeping clients happy, or getting new business, his rudeness on FB will affect his bottom line.

Perhaps he was repressing this before, but now he is choosing to show you -- and the rest of the world -- who he is.

If I were you, I would definitely "unfriend" or hide his posts on FB. Then he would be faced with the public consequences of his behavior, and you would be spared the temptation to correct him.

If your husband wants to be married to someone who respects him, he should clean up his act.

Dear Amy: Our mother recently died. Years ago, when Dad died, there was no acknowledgment from friends or relatives. With the passing of our mother, compassion went out the window. Some people responded with true sorrow, but for the most part I feel the rest of the condolences were from people guilted into it.

When these people had loss in their lives, we sent cards to all immediate family members. Through the grapevine, I heard that their lives were so filled with other family matters -- including health problems -- that they couldn't respond to Mom's death. These are adults. Some are blood relatives.

What is wrong with these people? The way I feel right now is when a future loss occurs for them, I will send a blank postcard saying, "Sorry for your loss. This is more than I got from you."

-- Disappointed

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