Know-it-all brother doesn't know relationships
Dear Amy: My brother has always been difficult to deal with. He thinks he knows everything about everything. I have always overlooked his faults and helped him out. He has been divorced twice and only knows one of his three children. He has been fired from numerous jobs, and has lost countless friends and girlfriends because of his know-it-all attitude.
Recently on a trip to our family home upstate, our mother asked him to move to the end of our deck to smoke his cigarette. The smoke bothers me, and my mother has COPD. He refused, saying, "... get used to it."
I couldn't believe he wouldn't move 15 feet away. He began screaming at me and cursing.
I responded by saying that if he continued this behavior, he would be a very lonely person.
I haven't spoken to my brother since, but somehow my mother is angry with me for confronting him.
My mother always sides with my brother. He helps her out, and I am also constantly there for her, but she feels sorry for him and continues to make excuses for his behavior.
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I refuse to go to our upstate home if he is there and will not refrain from smoking in my presence.
Am I being unreasonable, or is this simply another case of my brother asserting control?
I need an impartial opinion.
-- Upset Sister