ArcaMax

Dear What May I Say?: You don't owe your husband any kind of protection over the consequences of his behavior, but you do owe your children a measure of privacy about this.

You will obviously want to discuss this with a very close friend, but you should be circumspect and understand that even if you ask that the details be kept private, things have a way of leaking out.

Remember, we seldom regret the things we don't say, but often regret the things we do say.

You can respond to questions by saying, "My husband and I had different ideas of how to be married." People can read into that whatever they want.

Answer your children's questions honestly, but do not confide in them or expect them to take sides. Assure them that you -- and they -- will be OK, and that they are loved by both parents. They will discern the truth soon enough, and will have to grapple with their own reactions to it.

Dear Amy: Like "Non-Hugger," I don't like to hug a lot of people. My wife tells me I have to do it, or others will feel slighted.

My daughter-in-law has accepted that I say, "Let's have the awkward hug" when I welcome her. She has started to laugh about it as just part of our relationship. My oldest son makes a joke out of it as he embraces me in a man-hug. My other sons know the drill, but don't doubt my love for them.

-- Not a Hugger

Dear Not a Hugger: Your wife doesn't get to force you to let people touch you. You sound like a good sport, but stand your ground.

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)