Annie's Mailbox: Fed Up in a Lonely Home, Blow It Out Your Ear
Dear Annie: I've been on antidepressant and bipolar medication for 12 years. The problem is, I feel I am being overmedicated. I want to sleep all day. I am also legally deaf. I live with my parents because I am unable to drive. My depression and resulting destructive spiral caused my grades to go south in college, which has interfered with my ability to find a good job in my field, and not all employers are willing to make accommodations for a hearing disability.
My family does not treat me particularly well. The medication helped a lot, but being on the meds for so long has caused other problems, including issues with my short-term memory. I am tired of taking medication that I feel is hindering more than helping. I saw a counselor for a while some years ago, and that did more for me than any medication could.
My family refuses to listen to me when I tell them the new medication is causing excessive drowsiness. I have been told to simply suck it up. My family won't let me stop the medication. I know I am bipolar, but this does not give my family the right to treat me like a second-class citizen.
I would like to find a job so I can earn enough money to go back to college, but I have no idea where to start. My only job experience is some community service I did as part of my high school graduation requirements. -- Fed Up in a Lonely Home
Dear Fed Up: First phone or make an appointment to see the doctor who prescribed your current medication, and explain the drowsiness. It is likely you can have it adjusted. Also, you could use some emotional support. Please contact the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance at dbsalliance.org. Then check your state, city and county government offices for jobs for the disabled, along with the U.S. Dept. of Labor (doleta.gov) and servicelocator.org at 1-877-US2-JOBS. Don't let your parents' lack of support hold you back.
Dear Annie: My husband is a chain smoker, has very poor dental hygiene and has lost many teeth.
He has never been an affectionate person, but when he does decide to kiss me, I am repulsed by his cigarette breath and the fact that he hasn't brushed his teeth. Therefore, I usually try to avoid being near him.
My question to you is: Should I nicely tell him he needs to see a dentist? -- S.
Dear S.: Yes, dear. Otherwise, you will be stuck with this situation for the rest of your married life, and over time, it will put a terrible and unnecessary strain on your relationship. Tell him that his breath could use some assistance. Make him understand that not brushing his teeth puts him at risk for heart disease. We suspect he harbors a fear of dentists, so assure him that current dental techniques take that into consideration, and there are various ways to alleviate discomfort. Ask him to come with you to find a dentist he is comfortable with. Also buy him some breath freshener that he can gargle with. That may be all he is willing to do, and it will help.
Dear Annie: It is with disgust that I feel the need to respond to "Disappointed," who is in support of individuals blowing their noses at the dinner table.
I realize she's climbing on the "medical excuse train" in order to offset accountability for grossing out her dinner companions, yet I found her reasons to be selfishly juvenile at best. I, too, have a medical condition -- colitis. Does that justify continuous flatulence at the dinner table?
Get over yourself, honey. If you feel the need to blow your nose, excuse yourself. If you blow constantly, politely decline any dinner invitations until you schedule an appointment with an allergist and an ENT. -- Blow It Out Your Ear
This Classic Annie's Mailbox column was originally published in 2014. To find out more about Classic Annie's Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit Creators Syndicate at www.creators.com.