Ding, Dong, the Doorbell's Dead


"The doorbell isn't working," I said to my husband.

"I figured that when I pushed it and no sound came out," he replied.

"What should we do?" I said. Doorbell repairs were not my forte.

"Add it to the list," he said as he unloaded a half-dozen boxes into the house.

We had just moved into our new place, and we had a growing list of things that needed to be repaired or replaced. When we had done our walk-through, we discovered the lights that didn't light, the faucet that didn't faucet and the dryer that didn't dry. But for some reason, we never checked the doorbell. Who thinks about a doorbell? You push it and it dings. If it doesn't ding, the doorbell is dead. That's where they get the saying "dead as a doorbell." Or is it doornail? These are the things that keep me up at night.

Anyway, not having a working doorbell was a bit of an issue because we were in the throes of moving stuff in and a lot of it was being delivered. When the delivery guys arrived, they rang the doorbell. And since it didn't ring, I didn't know they were there. And when I didn't answer the door because I didn't know they were there, they left. Which is why, a week into our move, I was still sitting on the floor in the living room, instead of on a sofa.


Of course, in the grand scheme of things, not having a working doorbell is not nearly on the same level as, say, not having a door. If it were the reverse, and we had a doorbell but no door, that would probably be a bigger issue. And if that were the case, we wouldn't really need a doorbell because we would be able to see whoever it was who was standing in our empty doorway.

Unable to do anything about the doorbell, my husband and I went about moving and unpacking and then took a break to go out to dinner. When we got back, I noticed that the doorbell was no longer where it had been on the wall next to our door. It was, instead, lying on its back on the ground.

"What happened to the doorbell?" I said to my husband.

"Looks like it leapt to its death," he said. "I guess it just didn't want to doorbell anymore."


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