... continued from above

When I heard that oxygen and magnesium hooked up I was like OMg.

The barman says: "We don't serve faster-than-light particles here."
A tachyon enters a bar.

How many programmers does it ...Read More

Pavlov is enjoying a pint in the pub. The phone rings. He jumps up and shouts: "Oh heck, I forgot to feed the dog!"

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac spend most of his time doing?
Staying up all night ...Read More

Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick four ...Read More

At the scale manufacturers' convention, people often wanted to weigh themselves on different scales to see if they agreed. However, some visitors abstained, not wishing to advertise their weight.

A smooth-talking ...Read More

I realized that my five-year-old grandson had been watching too many reality TV shows the day we at- tended a relative's wedding.

As the four bridesmaids walked down the aisle toward the front of the church, he turned to...Read More

After being told, the 16-year-old girl asked, ‘What’s a magazine?’

Conan O'Brien