Headlines from 2040


Published in Jokes

-- Baby conceived naturally.... Scientists stumped.

-- Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.

-- Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

-- George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

-- Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $7.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesday only.

-- 35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

-- Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.


-- Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

-- Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it crashes BEFORE installation is completed.

-- New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled up newspapers must be registered by January 2041.

-- Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

-- IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%



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