Rhyme and punishment
It's with them that I'm sharing these drinks."
But yesterday evening, the guy orders two,
Which fills me with very grave doubt.
I asks him real gently, "How goes it with you?
Has somebody's luck just run out?"
He laughs for a bit and then takes a big slug
And stares back at me, quite unblinking.
"My brothers are fine. They're both warm and snug,
It's merely that I have quit drinking."
The Lady and the Dog, retold as a triple iambic quatrain
A man and a dog were outside one night
When up walked a lady, who, after a while
Asked of the man, "Does your doggy bite?"
"Never," he said with a confident smile.
The lady got down in a bit of a crouch
And patted the fellow right under his chin.
A few seconds later, she screamed out an "OUCH!"
As canine sunk canine deep into her skin.
Recoiling in horror, the lady then spoke:
"Your dog didn't bite, you said!" (She was agog.)
The man shrugged his shoulders, took a drag on his smoke
"The thing is," he said slowly, "that isn't my dog."
Gene Weingarten can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow him on Twitter, @geneweingarten. Chat with him online Tuesdays at noon Eastern at www.washingtonpost.com.
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