Happy New Year! May your 2013 be filled with love, laughter, passion and 365 full nights of sleep.
Through the years, I've discovered something about New Year's resolutions: While it's not so easy to keep them, it's very easy to make them for other people. And a lot more fun, too. So here are some New Year's resolutions I'd like to hear assorted public figures make and keep:
"I will remember that I won the election convincingly -- and govern accordingly." -- President Obama
"If someone asks me why I think I lost the election, I'll just say 'I guess they preferred the other guy's ideas.'" -- Mitt Romney
"I'll find better uses for my $150 million than trying to buy an election." -- Sheldon Adelson
"I will reach the fifth stage of grieving -- acceptance -- about Ohio, and send out a 'Sorry I blew that $300 million' card to my 2012 donors." -- Karl Rove
"I will use my final year in office to keep gun control on the front burner." -- Mayor Michael Bloomberg
"I will realize that destroying the economies of Germany's trading partners is not good for Germany's economy." -- Angela Merkel
"I will stop living my life on camera and have an actual childhood." -- Honey Boo Boo
"We will go away." -- Members of the Westboro Baptist Church
(c) 2013 Arianna Huffington. Distributed by Tribune Media Services, Inc.