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Section 28 of 33 - Table of Contents
The elder Margrave of Anspach was smitten with Mademoiselle d'Armagnac,
but he would not marry her, and said afterwards that he had never
intended to do so, because the familiarities which had passed between
her and the Marquis de Villequier (1716) had disgusted him. The lady's
mother would have liked nothing better than to surprise the Margrave with
her daughter in some critical situation: for this purpose he had
sufficient opportunities given him, but he was prudent, and conducted
himself with so much modesty, that he avoided the snare. To tell the
truth, I had given him a hint on the subject, for I was too well
acquainted with the mother, who is a very bad woman.
The Cardinal de Richelieu, notwithstanding his wit, had often fits of
distraction. Sometimes he would fancy himself a horse, and run jumping
about a billiard-table, neighing and snorting; this would last an hour,
at the end of which his people would put him to bed and cover him up
closely to induce perspiration; when he awoke the fit had passed and did
not appear again.
The Archbishop of Paris reprimanded the Bishop of Gap on the bad
reputation which he had acquired in consequence of his intercourse with
women. "Ah, Monseigneur," replied the Bishop of Gap, "if you knew what
you talk of, you would not be astonished. I lived the first forty years
of my life without experiencing it; I don't know what induced me to
venture on it, but, having done so, it is impossible to refrain. Only
try it for once, Monseigneur, and you will perceive the truth of what I
tell you."
[This Bishop, whose name was Herve, had lived in prudence and
regularity up to the age of fifty, when he began, on a sudden, to
lead a very debauched life. They compelled him to give up his
Bishopric, which he did on condition of being allowed to stay at
Paris as much as he chose. He continued to live in perpetual
pleasure, but towards the close of his career he repented of his
sins and engaged with the Capuchin missionaries.]
This Bishop is now living in the village of Boulogne, near Paris: he is a
little priest, very ugly, with a large head and fiery red face.
Our late King said, "I am, I confess, somewhat piqued to see that,
with all the authority belonging to my station in this country, I have
exclaimed so long against high head-dresses, while no one had the
complaisance to lower them for me in the slightest degree. But now, when
a mere strange English wench arrives with a little low head-dress, all
the Princesses think fit to go at once from one extremity to another."
A Frenchman who had taken refuge in Holland informed me by letter of what
was passing with respect to the Prince of Orange. Thinking that I should
do the King a service by communicating to him these news, I hastened to
him, and he thanked me for them. In the evening, however, he said to me,
smiling, "My Ministers will have it that you have been misinformed, and
that your correspondent has not written you one word of truth."
I replied, "Time will show which is better informed, your Majesty's
Ministers or my correspondent. For my own part, Sire, my intention at
least was good."
Some time afterwards, when the report of the approaching accession of
William to the throne of England became public, M. de Torcy came to me to
beg I would acquaint him with my news. I replied, "I receive none now;
you told the King that what I formerly had was false, and upon this I
desired my correspondents to send me no more, for I do not love to spread
false reports." He laughed, as he always did, and said, "Your news have
turned out to be quite correct." I replied, "A great and able Minister
ought surely to have news more correct than I can obtain; and I have been
angry with myself for having formerly acquainted the King with the
reports which had reached me. I ought to have recollected that his
clever Ministers are acquainted with everything." The King therefore
said to me, "You are making game of my Ministers."--"Sire," I replied, "I
am only giving them back their own."
M. de Louvois was the only person who was well served by his spies;
indeed, he never spared his money. All the Frenchmen who went into
Germany or Holland as dancing or fencing-masters, esquires, etc., were
paid by him to give him information of whatever passed in the several
Courts. After his death this system was discontinued, and thus it is
that the present Ministers are so ignorant of the affairs of other
nations.
Lauzun says the drollest things, and takes the most amusing, roundabout
way of intimating whatever he does not care to say openly. For example,
when he wished the King to understand that the Count de Marsan, brother
of M. Legrand, had attached himself to M. Chamillard, the then Minister,
he took the following means: "Sire," said he, with an air of the utmost
simplicity, as if he had not the least notion of malice, "I wished to
change my wigmaker, and employ the one who is now the most in fashion;
but I could not find him, for M. de Marsan has kept him shut up in his
room for several days past, making wigs for his household, and for M. de
Chamillard's friends."
The adventures of Prince Emmanuel of Portugal are a perfect romance.
His brother, the King, was desirous, it is said, at first, to have made
a priest and a Bishop of him; to this, however, he had an insuperable
objection, for he was in love. The King sent for him, and asked him if
it was true that he had really resolved not to enter the Church. On the
Prince's replying in the affirmative, the King, his brother, struck him.
The Prince said, "You are my King and my brother, and therefore I cannot
revenge myself as I ought upon you; but you have put an insult upon me
which I cannot endure, and you shall never again see me in the whole
course of your life." He is said to have set out on that very night.
His brother wrote to him, commanding his return from Paris to Holland; as
he made no reply to this command, his Governor and the Ambassador had no
doubt that it was his intention to obey it. In the course of last week
he expressed a desire to see Versailles and Marly. The Ambassador made
preparations for this excursion, and together with his wife accompanied
the Prince, whose Governor and one of his gentlemen were of the party.
Upon their return from Versailles, when they reached the courtyard, the
Prince called out to stop, and asked if there were any chaises ready:
"Yes, Monseigneur," replied a voice, "there are four."--"That will be
sufficient," replied the Prince. Then addressing the Ambassador, he
expressed his warmest thanks for the friendly attention he had shown him,
and assured him that he desired nothing so much as an opportunity to
testify his gratitude. "I am now going to set out," he added, "for
Vienna; the Emperor is my cousin; I have no doubt he will receive me,
and I shall learn in his army to become a soldier in the campaign against
the Turks." He then thanked the Governor for the pains he had bestowed
upon his education; and promised that, if any good fortune should befall
him, his Governor should share it with him. He also said something
complimentary to his gentleman. He then alighted, called for the
post-chaises, and took his seat in one of them; his favourite, a young
man of little experience, but, as it is said, of considerable talent,
placed himself in another, and his two valets de chambre into the third
and fourth. That nothing may be wanting to the romantic turn of his
adventures, it is said, besides, that Madame de Riveira was the object of
his affection in Portugal before she was married; that he even wished to
make her his wife, but that his brother would not permit it. A short
time before his departure, the husband, who is a very jealous man, found
him at his wife's feet; and this hastened the Prince's departure.
Henri IV. had been one day told of the infidelity of one of his
mistresses. Believing that the King had no intention of visiting her,
she made an assignation with the Duc de Bellegarde in her own apartment.
The King, having caused the time of his rival's coming to be watched,
when he was informed of his being there, went to his mistress's room.
He found her in bed, and she complained of a violent headache. The King
said he was very hungry, and wanted some supper; she replied that she had
not thought about supper, and believed she had only a couple of
partridges. Henri IV. desired they should be served up, and said he
would eat them with her. The supper which she had prepared for
Bellegarde, and which consisted of much more than two partridges, was
then served up; the King, taking up a small loaf, split it open, and,
sticking a whole partridge into it, threw it under the bed. "Sire,"
cried the lady, terrified to death, "what are you doing?"--"Madame,"
replied the merry monarch, "everybody must live." He then took his
departure, content with having frightened the lovers.
I have again seen M. La Mothe le Vayer; who, with all his sense, dresses
himself like a madman. He wears furred boots, and a cap which he never
takes off, lined with the same material, a large band, and a black velvet
coat.
We have had few Queens in France who have been really happy. Marie de
Medicis died in exile. The mother of the King and of the late Monsieur
was unhappy as long as her husband was alive. Our Queen Marie-Therese
said upon her death-bed, "that from the time of her becoming Queen she
had not had a day of real happiness."
Lauzun sometimes affects the simpleton that he may say disagreeable
things with impunity, for he is very malicious. In order to hint to
Marechal de Tesse that he did wrong in being so familiar with the common
people, he called out to him one night in the Salon at Marly, "Marshal,
pray give me a pinch of snuff; but let it be good--that, for example,
which I saw you taking this morning with Daigremont the chairman."
In the time of Henri IV. an Elector-Palatine came to France; the King's
household was sent to meet him. All his expenses were paid, as well as
those of his suite; and when he arrived at the Court he entered between
the Dauphin and Monsieur and dined with the King. I learned these
particulars from the late Monsieur. The King, under the pretence of
going to the chase, went about a league from Paris, and, meeting the
Elector, conducted him in his carriage. At Paris he was always attended
by the King's servants. This treatment is somewhat different from that
which, in my time, was bestowed upon Maximilian Maria, the Elector of
Bavaria. This Elector often enraged me with the foolish things that he
did. For example, he went to play and to dine with M. d'Antin, and never
evinced the least desire to dine with his own nephews. A sovereign,
whether he be Elector or not, might with propriety dine either at the
Dauphin's table or mine; and, if the Elector had chosen, he might have
come to us; but he was contented to dine with M. d'Antin or M. de Torcy,
and some ladies of the King's suite. I am angry to this day when I think
of it. The King used often to laugh at my anger on this subject; and,
whenever the Elector committed some new absurdity, he used to call to me
in the cabinet and ask me, "Well, Madame, what have you to say to that?"
I would reply, "All that the Elector does is alike ridiculous." This
made the King laugh heartily. The Elector had a Marshal, the Count
d'Arco, the brother of that person who had married in so singular a
manner the Prince's mistress, Popel, which marriage had been contracted
solely upon his promise never to be alone with his wife. The Marshal,
who was as honest as his brother was accommodating, was terribly annoyed
at his master's conduct; he came at first to me to impart to me his
chagrin whenever the Elector committed some folly; and when he behaved
better he used also to tell me of it. I rather think he must have been
forbidden to visit me, for latterly I never saw him. None of the
Elector's suite have visited me, and I presume they have been prevented.
This Prince's amorous intrigues have been by no means agreeable to the
King. The Elector was so fond of grisettes that, when the King was
giving names to each of the roads through the wood, he was exceedingly
anxious that one of them should be called L'Allee des Grisettes; but the
King would not consent to it. The Elector has perpetuated his race in
the villages; and two country girls have been pointed out to me who were
pregnant by him at his departure.
His marriage with a Polish Princess is a striking proof that a man cannot
avoid his fate. This was not a suitable match for him, and was managed
almost without his knowledge, as I have been told. His Councillors,
having been bought over, patched up the affair; and when the Elector only
caused it to be submitted for their deliberation, it was already decided
on.
This Elector's brother must have been made a Bishop of Cologne and
Munster without the production of proof of his nobility being demanded;
for it is well known that the King Sobieski was a Polish nobleman, who
married the daughter of Darquin, Captain of our late Monsieur's Swiss
Guards. Great suspicions are entertained respecting the children of the
Bavaria family, that is, the Elector and his brothers, who are thought to
have been the progeny of an Italian doctor named Simoni. It was said at
Court that the doctor had only given the Elector and his wife a strong
cordial, the effect of which had been to increase their family; but they
are all most suspiciously like the doctor.
I have heard it said that in England the people used to take my late
uncle, Rupert, for a sorcerer, and his large black dog for the Devil;
for this reason, when he joined the army and attacked the enemy, whole
regiments fled before him.
A knight of the Palatinate, who had served many years in India, told me
at Court in that country the first Minister and the keeper of the seals
hated each other mortally. The latter having one day occasion for the
seals, found they had been taken from the casket in which they were
usually kept. He was of course greatly terrified, for his head depended
upon their production. He went to one of his friends, and consulted with
him what he should do. His friend asked him if he had any enemies at
Court. "Yes," replied the keeper of the seals, "the chief Minister is my
mortal foe."--"So much the better," replied his friend; "go and set fire
to your house directly; take out of it nothing but the casket in which
the seals were kept, and take it directly to the chief Minister, telling
him you know no one with whom you can more safely deposit it; then go
home again and save whatever you can. When the fire shall be
extinguished, you must go to the King, and request him to order the chief
Minister to restore you the seals; and you must be sure to open the
casket before the Prince. If the seals are there, all will be explained;
if the Minister has not restored them, you must accuse him at once of
having stolen them; and thus you will be sure to ruin your enemy and
recover your seals." The keeper of the seals followed his friend's
advice exactly, and the seals were found again in the casket.
As soon as a royal child, which they call here un Enfant de France, is
born, and has been swaddled, they put on him a grand cordon; but they do
not create him a knight of the order until he has communicated; the
ceremony is then performed in the ordinary manner.
The ladies of chancellors here have the privilege of the tabouret when
they come to the toilette; but in the afternoon they are obliged to
stand. This practice began in the days of Marie de Medicis, when a
chancellor's wife happened to be in great favour. As she had a lame foot
and could not stand up, the Queen, who would have her come to visit her
every morning, allowed her to sit down. From this time the custom of
these ladies sitting in the morning has been continued.
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