Message for Daily Living - Column by Zig Ziglar

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This is Love?

Zig Ziglar

Over the past years, a common practice labels a child born out of wedlock as a "love child." One of the most visible figures in America fathered a daughter out of wedlock. She is being identified as a "love child." Obviously, everyone hopes that she is genuinely loved. Jesse Jackson fathered five children with his wife of 37 years, Jacqueline. Question: Do those five feel that they were not "love children"?

To help clarify this, let's look at the definition of love. The dictionary identifies love as "an affection of the mind, excited by beauty and worth of any kind, or by the qualities of the object which communicate pleasure, sensual or intellectual. A strong affection for or attachment to another person based on regard or shared experiences or interests."

Dr. Joyce Brothers says that love is something we all yearn for, and that to love and be loved is the most blissful state imaginable. She says love is "caring as much for the aims and welfare of another person as you do about your own aims and well-being."

Dr. J. Allan Petersen lists four words describing love. First is "stergo," which he describes as the love that is inherent in one's own nature. This is the kind of love a parent has for offspring. It can be, and often is, sacrificial. The second kind of love is "eros." Although eros usually carries a negative connotation, it can be either good or bad. Its basis is primarily in the physical and triggered by emotion. Eros is the heart of sexual desire and romantic feelings.

Third is "phileo." This kind of love is "a fondness or a liking based on similarity of outlook in life." The fourth, and easily the most beautiful kind of love, is "agape." Petersen saw this love culled out of one's heart by an awakened sense of value in the object loved that causes one to prize it. This love does not seek anything in return, not even acceptance of itself, but is first concerned for the other. It is the ultimate love, and it brings out the best in all of us.

Nearly 2,000 years ago, a Jewish scholar wrote his friends in Corinth and described real love. He said, and I quote, "Love is patient; love is kind. It does not envy; it does not boast. It is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails." These definitions make it clear that the offspring of an adulterous relationship is not a "love child."

Is the child who is the result of this illicit relationship going to enjoy all the benefits the children of real love share? Evidence is clear that this child will not have the benefits that Rev. Jackson's other five children have and still enjoy. God will love her as much as He loves all the others, but this child will be burned with a stigma through no fault of her own.

Though "love child," a term which I believe was created out of "political correctness," is less harsh than the prior label given to children born out of wedlock, it is a label that romanticizes a very hurtful and harmful situation for a child. A more accurate label, if the press and public insist on a label at all, would be "unfortunate child." The real love children are those born to the husband and wife who raise them together, give them their name and provide the best possible start for success in this life.

To find out more about Zig Ziglar and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com. Subscribe to Zig Ziglar's free e-mail newsletter through info@zigziglar.com.

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Copyright 2009 Creators Syndicate Inc.

This news arrived on: 11/16/2009

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Posted Comments:

11-14-2009 13:43

Diviner13 wrote:

Who cares??

What does this have to do with Business Success? I signed up for this so that I would have some helpful insights into building success in business, not to read self-righteous ramblings of right wing moral mouth-piece.

Time to add this to my spam filter.

Regards,

Diviner.