From the ArcaMax Publishing, Jokes Newsletter:
http://www.arcamax.com/news/jokes/s-372920-190940
• "How much do Windows cost, and do you have to buy each one
separately?"
• Customer: "How much do Windows cost?"
Tech Support:
"Windows costs about $100."
Customer: "Oh, that's kind of
expensive. Can I buy just one window?"
• Tech Support: "Do you have any windows open right now?"
Customer: "Are you crazy woman, it's twenty below outside..."
• "I try to avoid using Microsoft. That's why I use MS-DOS."
• Tech Support: "How can I help you?"
Customer: "Well,
everything is working fine, but there is one program that is not."
Tech Support: "What program is it?"
Customer: "It's called
'MSDOS Prompt'."
Tech Support: "What's wrong with it?"
Customer: "Well, I click on it, a black screen shows up with NOTHING
but a sign that reads: 'C:\WINDOWS>', and it just sits there and
doesn't do anything. I have to turn off the system to go back to
Windows."
• Customer: "File manager? What's that?"
Tech Support: "How
long have you had your computer?"
Customer: "Three years."
• "I have a 386 Pentium."
• "My brother has a 486 with a Pentium chip in it."
• Customer: "The computer told me it had contagious memory. Does it
have a virus?"
Tech Support: "No, that is 'contiguous' memory,
as in 'sequential'."
Customer: "That is impossible, it said
'contagious'."
Tech Support: "Type 'mem' and hit the 'enter'
key."
Customer: "Oh."
• "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."