Section 42 of 74 - Table of Contents
For they were right witty scholars. And he heard their aresouns each gen
other as touching birth and righteousness, young Madden maintaining that
put such case it were hard the wife to die (for so it had fallen out a
matter of some year agone with a woman of Eblana in Horne's house that
now was trespassed out of this world and the self night next before her
death all leeches and pothecaries had taken counsel of her case). And
they said farther she should live because in the beginning, they said,
the woman should bring forth in pain and wherefore they that were of this
imagination affirmed how young Madden had said truth for he had
conscience to let her die. And not few and of these was young Lynch were
in doubt that the world was now right evil governed as it was never other
howbeit the mean people believed it otherwise but the law nor his judges
did provide no remedy. A redress God grant. This was scant said but all
cried with one acclaim nay, by our Virgin Mother, the wife should live
and the babe to die. In colour whereof they waxed hot upon that head what
with argument and what for their drinking but the franklin Lenehan was
prompt each when to pour them ale so that at the least way mirth might
not lack. Then young Madden showed all the whole affair and said how that
she was dead and how for holy religion sake by rede of palmer and
bedesman and for a vow he had made to Saint Ultan of Arbraccan her
goodman husband would not let her death whereby they were all wondrous
grieved. To whom young Stephen had these words following: Murmur, sirs,
is eke oft among lay folk. Both babe and parent now glorify their Maker,
the one in limbo gloom, the other in purgefire. But, gramercy, what of
those Godpossibled souls that we nightly impossibilise, which is the sin
against the Holy Ghost, Very God, Lord and Giver of Life? For, sirs, he
said, our lust is brief. We are means to those small creatures within us
and nature has other ends than we. Then said Dixon junior to Punch
Costello wist he what ends. But he had overmuch drunken and the best word
he could have of him was that he would ever dishonest a woman whoso she
were or wife or maid or leman if it so fortuned him to be delivered of
his spleen of lustihead. Whereat Crotthers of Alba Longa sang young
Malachi's praise of that beast the unicorn how once in the millennium he
cometh by his horn, the other all this while, pricked forward with their
jibes wherewith they did malice him, witnessing all and several by saint
Foutinus his engines that he was able to do any manner of thing that lay
in man to do. Thereat laughed they all right jocundly only young Stephen
and sir Leopold which never durst laugh too open by reason of a strange
humour which he would not bewray and also for that he rued for her that
bare whoso she might be or wheresoever. Then spake young Stephen orgulous
of mother Church that would cast him out of her bosom, of law of canons,
of Lilith, patron of abortions, of bigness wrought by wind of seeds of
brightness or by potency of vampires mouth to mouth or, as Virgilius
saith, by the influence of the occident or by the reek of moonflower or
an she lie with a woman which her man has but lain with, EFFECTU SECUTO,
or peradventure in her bath according to the opinions of Averroes and
Moses Maimonides. He said also how at the end of the second month a human
soul was infused and how in all our holy mother foldeth ever souls for
God's greater glory whereas that earthly mother which was but a dam to
bear beastly should die by canon for so saith he that holdeth the
fisherman's seal, even that blessed Peter on which rock was holy church
for all ages founded. All they bachelors then asked of sir Leopold would
he in like case so jeopard her person as risk life to save life. A
wariness of mind he would answer as fitted all and, laying hand to jaw,
he said dissembling, as his wont was, that as it was informed him, who
had ever loved the art of physic as might a layman, and agreeing also
with his experience of so seldomseen an accident it was good for that
mother Church belike at one blow had birth and death pence and in such
sort deliverly he scaped their questions. That is truth, pardy, said
Dixon, and, or I err, a pregnant word. Which hearing young Stephen was a
marvellous glad man and he averred that he who stealeth from the poor
lendeth to the Lord for he was of a wild manner when he was drunken and
that he was now in that taking it appeared eftsoons.
But sir Leopold was passing grave maugre his word by cause he still had
pity of the terrorcausing shrieking of shrill women in their labour and
as he was minded of his good lady Marion that had borne him an only
manchild which on his eleventh day on live had died and no man of art
could save so dark is destiny. And she was wondrous stricken of heart for
that evil hap and for his burial did him on a fair corselet of lamb's
wool, the flower of the flock, lest he might perish utterly and lie
akeled (for it was then about the midst of the winter) and now Sir
Leopold that had of his body no manchild for an heir looked upon him his
friend's son and was shut up in sorrow for his forepassed happiness and
as sad as he was that him failed a son of such gentle courage (for all
accounted him of real parts) so grieved he also in no less measure for
young Stephen for that he lived riotously with those wastrels and
murdered his goods with whores.
About that present time young Stephen filled all cups that stood empty so
as there remained but little mo if the prudenter had not shadowed their
approach from him that still plied it very busily who, praying for the
intentions of the sovereign pontiff, he gave them for a pledge the vicar
of Christ which also as he said is vicar of Bray. Now drink we, quod he,
of this mazer and quaff ye this mead which is not indeed parcel of my
body but my soul's bodiment. Leave ye fraction of bread to them that live
by bread alone. Be not afeard neither for any want for this will comfort
more than the other will dismay. See ye here. And he showed them
glistering coins of the tribute and goldsmith notes the worth of two
pound nineteen shilling that he had, he said, for a song which he writ.
They all admired to see the foresaid riches in such dearth of money as
was herebefore. His words were then these as followeth: Know all men, he
said, time's ruins build eternity's mansions. What means this? Desire's
wind blasts the thorntree but after it becomes from a bramblebush to be a
rose upon the rood of time. Mark me now. In woman's womb word is made
flesh but in the spirit of the maker all flesh that passes becomes the
word that shall not pass away. This is the postcreation. OMNIS CARO AD TE
VENIET. No question but her name is puissant who aventried the dear corse
of our Agenbuyer, Healer and Herd, our mighty mother and mother most
venerable and Bernardus saith aptly that She hath an OMNIPOTENTIAM
DEIPARAE SUPPLICEM, that is to wit, an almightiness of petition because
she is the second Eve and she won us, saith Augustine too, whereas that
other, our grandam, which we are linked up with by successive anastomosis
of navelcords sold us all, seed, breed and generation, for a penny
pippin. But here is the matter now. Or she knew him, that second I say,
and was but creature of her creature, VERGINE MADRE, FIGLIA DI TUO
FIGLIO, or she knew him not and then stands she in the one denial or
ignorancy with Peter Piscator who lives in the house that Jack built and
with Joseph the joiner patron of the happy demise of all unhappy
marriages, PARCEQUE M. LEO TAXIL NOUS A DIT QUE QUI L'AVAIT MISE DANS
CETTE FICHUE POSITION C'ETAIT LE SACRE PIGEON, VENTRE DE DIEU! ENTWEDER
transubstantiality ODER consubstantiality but in no case
subsubstantiality. And all cried out upon it for a very scurvy word. A
pregnancy without joy, he said, a birth without pangs, a body without
blemish, a belly without bigness. Let the lewd with faith and fervour
worship. With will will we withstand, withsay.
Hereupon Punch Costello dinged with his fist upon the board and would
sing a bawdy catch STABOO STABELLA about a wench that was put in pod of a
jolly swashbuckler in Almany which he did straightways now attack: THE
FIRST THREE MONTHS SHE WAS NOT WELL, STABOO, when here nurse Quigley from
the door angerly bid them hist ye should shame you nor was it not meet as
she remembered them being her mind was to have all orderly against lord
Andrew came for because she was jealous that no gasteful turmoil might
shorten the honour of her guard. It was an ancient and a sad matron of a
sedate look and christian walking, in habit dun beseeming her megrims and
wrinkled visage, nor did her hortative want of it effect for
incontinently Punch Costello was of them all embraided and they reclaimed
the churl with civil rudeness some and shaked him with menace of
blandishments others whiles they all chode with him, a murrain seize the
dolt, what a devil he would be at, thou chuff, thou puny, thou got in
peasestraw, thou losel, thou chitterling, thou spawn of a rebel, thou
dykedropt, thou abortion thou, to shut up his drunken drool out of that
like a curse of God ape, the good sir Leopold that had for his cognisance
the flower of quiet, margerain gentle, advising also the time's occasion
as most sacred and most worthy to be most sacred. In Horne's house rest
should reign.
To be short this passage was scarce by when Master Dixon of Mary in
Eccles, goodly grinning, asked young Stephen what was the reason why he
had not cided to take friar's vows and he answered him obedience in the
womb, chastity in the tomb but involuntary poverty all his days. Master
Lenehan at this made return that he had heard of those nefarious deeds
and how, as he heard hereof counted, he had besmirched the lily virtue of
a confiding female which was corruption of minors and they all
intershowed it too, waxing merry and toasting to his fathership. But he
said very entirely it was clean contrary to their suppose for he was the
eternal son and ever virgin. Thereat mirth grew in them the more and they
rehearsed to him his curious rite of wedlock for the disrobing and
deflowering of spouses, as the priests use in Madagascar island, she to
be in guise of white and saffron, her groom in white and grain, with
burning of nard and tapers, on a bridebed while clerks sung kyries and
the anthem UT NOVETUR SEXUS OMNIS CORPORIS MYSTERIUM till she was there
unmaided. He gave them then a much admirable hymen minim by those
delicate poets Master John Fletcher and Master Francis Beaumont that is
in their MAID'S TRAGEDY that was writ for a like twining of lovers: TO
BED, TO BED was the burden of it to be played with accompanable concent
upon the virginals. An exquisite dulcet epithalame of most mollificative
suadency for juveniles amatory whom the odoriferous flambeaus of the
paranymphs have escorted to the quadrupedal proscenium of connubial
communion. Well met they were, said Master Dixon, joyed, but, harkee,
young sir, better were they named Beau Mount and Lecher for, by my troth,
of such a mingling much might come. Young Stephen said indeed to his best
remembrance they had but the one doxy between them and she of the stews
to make shift with in delights amorous for life ran very high in those
days and the custom of the country approved with it. Greater love than
this, he said, no man hath that a man lay down his wife for his friend.
Go thou and do likewise. Thus, or words to that effect, saith
Zarathustra, sometime regius professor of French letters to the
university of Oxtail nor breathed there ever that man to whom mankind was
more beholden. Bring a stranger within thy tower it will go hard but thou
wilt have the secondbest bed. ORATE, FRATRES, PRO MEMETIPSO. And all the
people shall say, Amen. Remember, Erin, thy generations and thy days of
old, how thou settedst little by me and by my word and broughtedst in a
stranger to my gates to commit fornication in my sight and to wax fat and
kick like Jeshurum. Therefore hast thou sinned against my light and hast
made me, thy lord, to be the slave of servants. Return, return, Clan
Milly: forget me not, O Milesian. Why hast thou done this abomination
before me that thou didst spurn me for a merchant of jalaps and didst
deny me to the Roman and to the Indian of dark speech with whom thy
daughters did lie luxuriously? Look forth now, my people, upon the land
of behest, even from Horeb and from Nebo and from Pisgah and from the
Horns of Hatten unto a land flowing with milk and money. But thou hast
suckled me with a bitter milk: my moon and my sun thou hast quenched for
ever. And thou hast left me alone for ever in the dark ways of my
bitterness: and with a kiss of ashes hast thou kissed my mouth. This
tenebrosity of the interior, he proceeded to say, hath not been illumined
by the wit of the septuagint nor so much as mentioned for the Orient from
on high Which brake hell's gates visited a darkness that was foraneous.
Assuefaction minorates atrocities (as Tully saith of his darling Stoics)
and Hamlet his father showeth the prince no blister of combustion. The
adiaphane in the noon of life is an Egypt's plague which in the nights of
prenativity and postmortemity is their most proper UBI and QUOMODO. And
as the ends and ultimates of all things accord in some mean and measure
with their inceptions and originals, that same multiplicit concordance
which leads forth growth from birth accomplishing by a retrogressive
metamorphosis that minishing and ablation towards the final which is
agreeable unto nature so is it with our subsolar being. The aged sisters
draw us into life: we wail, batten, sport, clip, clasp, sunder, dwindle,
die: over us dead they bend. First, saved from waters of old Nile, among
bulrushes, a bed of fasciated wattles: at last the cavity of a mountain,
an occulted sepulchre amid the conclamation of the hillcat and the
ossifrage. And as no man knows the ubicity of his tumulus nor to what
processes we shall thereby be ushered nor whether to Tophet or to
Edenville in the like way is all hidden when we would backward see from
what region of remoteness the whatness of our whoness hath fetched his
whenceness.
Thereto Punch Costello roared out mainly ETIENNE CHANSON but he loudly
bid them, lo, wisdom hath built herself a house, this vast majestic
longstablished vault, the crystal palace of the Creator, all in applepie
order, a penny for him who finds the pea.
BEHOLD THE MANSION REARED BY DEDAL JACK
SEE THE MALT STORED IN MANY A REFLUENT SACK,
IN THE PROUD CIRQUE OF JACKJOHN'S BIVOUAC.
A black crack of noise in the street here, alack, bawled back. Loud on
left Thor thundered: in anger awful the hammerhurler. Came now the storm
that hist his heart. And Master Lynch bade him have a care to flout and
witwanton as the god self was angered for his hellprate and paganry. And
he that had erst challenged to be so doughty waxed wan as they might all
mark and shrank together and his pitch that was before so haught uplift
was now of a sudden quite plucked down and his heart shook within the
cage of his breast as he tasted the rumour of that storm. Then did some
mock and some jeer and Punch Costello fell hard again to his yale which
Master Lenehan vowed he would do after and he was indeed but a word and a
blow on any the least colour. But the braggart boaster cried that an old
Nobodaddy was in his cups it was muchwhat indifferent and he would not
lag behind his lead. But this was only to dye his desperation as cowed he
crouched in Horne's hall. He drank indeed at one draught to pluck up a
heart of any grace for it thundered long rumblingly over all the heavens
so that Master Madden, being godly certain whiles, knocked him on his
ribs upon that crack of doom and Master Bloom, at the braggart's side,
spoke to him calming words to slumber his great fear, advertising how it
was no other thing but a hubbub noise that he heard, the discharge of
fluid from the thunderhead, look you, having taken place, and all of the
order of a natural phenomenon.
But was young Boasthard's fear vanquished by Calmer's words? No, for he
had in his bosom a spike named Bitterness which could not by words be
done away. And was he then neither calm like the one nor godly like the
other? He was neither as much as he would have liked to be either. But
could he not have endeavoured to have found again as in his youth the
bottle Holiness that then he lived withal? Indeed no for Grace was not
there to find that bottle. Heard he then in that clap the voice of the
god Bringforth or, what Calmer said, a hubbub of Phenomenon? Heard? Why,
he could not but hear unless he had plugged him up the tube Understanding
(which he had not done). For through that tube he saw that he was in the
land of Phenomenon where he must for a certain one day die as he was like
the rest too a passing show. And would he not accept to die like the rest
and pass away? By no means would he though he must nor would he make more
shows according as men do with wives which Phenomenon has commanded them
to do by the book Law. Then wotted he nought of that other land which is
called Believe-on-Me, that is the land of promise which behoves to the
king Delightful and shall be for ever where there is no death and no
birth neither wiving nor mothering at which all shall come as many as
believe on it? Yes, Pious had told him of that land and Chaste had
pointed him to the way but the reason was that in the way he fell in with
a certain whore of an eyepleasing exterior whose name, she said, is Bird-
in-the-Hand and she beguiled him wrongways from the true path by her
flatteries that she said to him as, Ho, you pretty man, turn aside hither
and I will show you a brave place, and she lay at him so flatteringly
that she had him in her grot which is named Two-in-the-Bush or, by some
learned, Carnal Concupiscence.
This was it what all that company that sat there at commons in Manse of
Mothers the most lusted after and if they met with this whore Bird-in-
the-Hand (which was within all foul plagues, monsters and a wicked devil)
they would strain the last but they would make at her and know her. For
regarding Believe-on-Me they said it was nought else but notion and they
could conceive no thought of it for, first, Two-in-the-Bush whither she
ticed them was the very goodliest grot and in it were four pillows on
which were four tickets with these words printed on them, Pickaback and
Topsyturvy and Shameface and Cheek by Jowl and, second, for that foul
plague Allpox and the monsters they cared not for them for Preservative
had given them a stout shield of oxengut and, third, that they might take
no hurt neither from Offspring that was that wicked devil by virtue of
this same shield which was named Killchild. So were they all in their
blind fancy, Mr Cavil and Mr Sometimes Godly, Mr Ape Swillale, Mr False
Franklin, Mr Dainty Dixon, Young Boasthard and Mr Cautious Calmer.
Wherein, O wretched company, were ye all deceived for that was the voice
of the god that was in a very grievous rage that he would presently lift
his arm up and spill their souls for their abuses and their spillings
done by them contrariwise to his word which forth to bring brenningly
biddeth.
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