Family Film Reviews

Do you qualify for easy money and great prizes
for playing fun games and doing quick game reviews -
all in your spare time?

PaidGamePlayer is perfect for all students,
stay-at-home moms, and anyone else that needs
to make extra money...

Learn How HERE

ArcaMax Publishing > Entertainment > Family Film Reviews

Your email address is safe with us. View our Privacy policy.

The Zodiac and You:

Find out all about the zodiac and your astrological sign.

The Funnies:

Get free jokes, comics, and more! See them all on
our funnies page

Author Bio:
Jane Horwitz's "Family Film Goer" has been offering meticulous, informed reviews of all the latest films since August of 1993. Her attention to ...

Read more about Jane Horwitz.

Books:

Read the classics online or by email. More details on the books page

Games:

Fun online games, quizzes, hangman and more on the games page

Jane Horwitz

"X-Men Origins: Wolverine" (PG-13, 1 hr., 48 min.)

There's a brooding intensity to this prequel about the origin of Wolverine, leader of the mutant X-Men fighters (based on the comic books). It is even darker than the already somber-toned trio of PG-13 hits -- "X-Men" (2000), "X2" (2003) and "X-Men: The Last Stand" (2006) that preceded it and very, very violent. There are many implied impalements and a beheading, but all with little gore. Still, it remains an iffy proposition for middle-schoolers or preteens. This is a fable in which violence resolves every situation and innocents die. There's a grim subplot about an island of captured mutants kept in a nuclear power plant. The script contains occasional profanity and sexual innuendo, and there is brief male nudity -- but from a great distance with no visible details.

A strong cast led by Hugh Jackman as Logan/Wolverine and Liev Schreiber as his murderous half-brother Victor/Sabretooth helps a viewer over the narrative bumps, which are several, including a puzzling prologue and a muddled ending that only partially sorts out all the strands in the story. We meet James Logan and Victor as boys in 1845, living in Canada's Northwest Territories. There's a killing and the boys flee. Young Logan already has superhuman strength and blades of bone that pop out of his knuckles when he's riled. We follow the seemingly immortal half brothers through the Civil War, World Wars I and II, and Vietnam. Victor, too, has superhuman powers -- the strength, speed, nails and teeth of a tiger whenever he needs it. Hence the moniker Sabretooth. Unlike Logan, Victor becomes an amoral murderer.

During Vietnam, Victor and Logan are recruited by a sinister American military man, Stryker (Danny Huston), to join a team of other mutants with special powers. It's implied they kill a group of Nigerians in the process of retrieving a valuable meteorite. After that, Logan drops out and Victor stays. Logan returns to the north woods, works as a lumberjack and lives with his girlfriend, Kayla (Lynn Collins) -- until Victor appears and commits a murder just to hurt Logan. Bent on revenge, Logan finds Stryker and lets him do a dangerous experiment, using the meteorite's super element to change his skeleton and those knuckle blades into unbreakable metal. Now calling himself Wolverine, Logan seeks out former "team" member Wraith (musician will.i.am) to help him find and kill Victor.

Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various ages

-- OK FOR KIDS 8 AND OLDER:

"Dragonball: Evolution" PG -- Brightly hued, yet bland, this special-effects-laden coming-of-age fantasy, based on a Japanese manga comic, shows martial-arts fights, hurled fireballs, falling rocks and zapper gunplay. Kids under 8 may be briefly scared by horned beasts, slime monsters and molten lava. There is a flying dragon, but it's not evil. The film contains mild sexual innuendo and teen bullying and the loss of a loved one. In a sci-fi near-future, the teenaged Goku (Justin Chatwin) gets a glass sphere with secret powers -- a Dragonball -- for his 18th birthday. The evil alien Lord Piccolo (James Marsters) comes after the Dragonball. Goku joins Master Roshi (Chow Yun-Fat), a young inventor (Emmy Rossum) and a desert highwayman (Joon Park) to fight back.

"Hannah Montana The Movie" G -- Teen pop star Hannah Montana's off-stage self, Miley Stewart, gets too big for her high-heeled sneakers in this saccharine confection, so her dad, Robby Ray Stewart, decides she needs some "Hannah detox" time at the family's Tennessee farm. Hannah's off-stage self, Miley Stewart, is played by Miley Cyrus, and Miley Stewart's dad, Robby Ray, is played by her real-life dad, country-and-western star Billy Ray Cyrus, so it's hard to see them as "just folks." But for little girls, none of this matters. They'll get to see Hannah/Miley sing, shop, take pratfalls, ride a horse, do a benefit to save the town from a developer, and flirt with an aw-shucks local boy (Lucas Till). The brashest phrase is "sweet cheeks," the strongest brew is iced tea and there is mild sexual innuendo. OK for under-8s, too, but they won't get everything.

-- OK FOR KIDS 10 AND OLDER:

"Battle for Terra" PG (NEW) -- Humorless and preachy, this computer-animated sci-fi tale (in 3-D) for kids tells of a peaceable planet called Terra attacked by human invaders seeking a home, now that Earth and the rest of their solar system are uninhabitable due to war and climate. The Earthlings' militarist leaders argue that all alien beings are expendable, but when Terrian teen inventor Mala (voice of Evan Rachel Wood) encounters invading Earthling officer Jim Stanton (Luke Wilson) and his translator robot Giddy (David Cross -- the film's only dash of wit), they find common ground and try to stop the impending battle. Mala's friend Senn (Justin Long) sees her helping a human and tells the planet elders, who thought at first the invaders might be gods. The animation is dim and colorless, though there's at least a nice whimsy in the way the Terrian world is conceived -- there are flying whales -- that echoes some 20th century art and architecture. There is at least one sacrificial suicide to save others. We see Mala witness her father's (nongraphic) death. There are Terrians abducted and possibly killed, and the aerial battles feature big explosions and destructive sci-fi zaps. Characters are shown nearly asphyxiated for lack of their home atmosphere. Kids 10 and older may at least find the ideas in the film worth pondering.

"Earth" G -- Though it is rated G, this hour-and-a-half reduction of the 11-hour "Planet Earth" documentary series that ran on cable TV in 2006 has many harrowing moments. What narrator James Earl Jones calls "the drama of the hunter and the hunted" occurs over and over. Animal-loving kids, especially those under 10, may find it upsetting to see a pride of lions bring down an elephant, or a leopard catch a young antelope. The filmmakers cut away before blood gets spilled, but "Earth" celebrates the pursuit, slowing it to a kind of ballet. We're also reminded that creatures can starve. The film features many creatures and plants, but focuses on a polar bear mother and cubs, and her doomed mate hunting on a melting ice shelf; a mother elephant and her calf; and a humpback whale and her calf -- all on the hunt for food or water. Even with a turgid symphonic score and overdramatic narration, the film feels abridged, but the footage is gorgeous. Just be sure your kids can handle the idea of animals dying.

-- PG-13s OF VARYING INTENSITY:

"X-Men Origins: Wolverine" (NEW) -- There's a brooding intensity to this prequel about the origin of Wolverine, leader of the mutant X-Men fighters (based on the comic books). It is darker than the trio of PG-13 hits -- "X-Men" (2000), "X2" (2003) and "X-Men: The Last Stand" (2006) that preceded it. The film is very violent, with lots of implied impalements and a beheading, but little gore. Innocents also die. So it is an iffy proposition for middle-schoolers or preteens. A strong cast led by Hugh Jackman as Logan/Wolverine and Liev Schreiber as his murderous half-brother Victor/Sabretooth helps us over the narrative bumps, which include a puzzling prologue and a muddled ending. We meet James Logan and Victor as boys in 1845 Canada. There's a killing and the boys, who both have mutant powers, flee. Logan already has blades of bone that pop out of his knuckles when he's riled. Victor develops a tiger's nails, teeth, speed and strength. We follow the two apparent immortals through the Civil War, World Wars and Vietnam. Victor becomes an amoral killer. He and Logan are recruited by a sinister military man, Stryker (Danny Huston), to join a mutant special ops team. It's implied they kill a group of Nigerian workers while retrieving a valuable meteorite. Logan leaves Victor and drops out. A few years later, Logan is living in the north woods with girlfriend Kayla (Lynn Collins). Victor commits a murder to hurt Logan. Bent on revenge, Logan finds Stryker and lets him experiment to change his bone and blades into unbreakable metal. Now calling himself Wolverine, he goes after Victor. The film has too much going on, such as the subplot about an island of captured mutants. The script contains occasional profanity and sexual innuendo, and there is nudity -- but from a great distance.

"Ghosts of Girlfriends Past" (NEW) -- This crass but semi-clever fable owes its plot to Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" and its sensibility to "Sex and the City." Matthew McConaughey spoofs his own screen persona as Connor, a selfish, smarmy fashion photographer who brags about bedding all his models, then dropping them cold. He's visited by the spirit of his late uncle (Michael Douglas, nearly stealing the movie), the selfish, smarmy guy who taught him how to treat "dames." His repentant uncle warns that three ghosts will appear to save Connor from himself. All this occurs on the eve of his younger brother's (Breckin Meyer) wedding, where Connor alienates everyone by drunkenly trash-talking marriage and trying to impress Jenny (Jennifer Garner), a childhood sweetie who broke his heart in middle-school and who is the reason for his self-protective piggishness. The movie dodges an R with witty euphemisms for sexual terms and descriptions of promiscuity. There is much sexual innuendo and a few briefly steamy but nonexplicit, largely implied, sexual situations. There are verbal references to orgies and drugs. The script has lots of midrange profanity and toilet humor. Connor shows signs of being an alcoholic. There is other drinking, midrange profanity, and a theme about losing one's parents as a child. Too crass and sexualized for middle-schoolers.

"Obsessed" (NEW) -- Beyonce Knowles does not test her acting skills as Sharon, a wife and mother threatened by a woman who is literally crazy for Sharon's husband in this cheesy, predictable thriller. The only nuanced performance is by Idris Elba as Derek, Sharon's stockbroker spouse. They have a toddler who only appears when it's convenient for the story. When Lisa (Ali Larter, flirty and snarky by turns), a temp at Derek's office, makes a play for him and won't accept his rebuff, the wheels are set in motion. (He does ogle her legs early on, but it's implied that's just him being male.) Lisa's behavior -- jumping into Derek's car in lingerie, drugging him at a company retreat so she can join him in his hotel bed, attempting suicide by overdose -- gets the attention of the cops. Sharon figures Derek's cheating and throws him out. Eventually, Lisa proves truly psychopathic. "Obsessed" can't end without a knock-down-drag-out between Sharon and Lisa. The film has considerable sexual innuendo and brief nonexplicit marital sexual situations. Lisa's attempted seductions are steamy, at least on her part, but stylized and nongraphic. At one point, the baby seems in danger. There is smoking, drinking and midrange profanity. Not at all for middle-schoolers.

"The Soloist" -- High art, edginess and entertainment mix in near-perfect proportions here. "The Soloist" is based (with some fictionalization) on columns by Los Angeles Times writer Steve Lopez (played by Robert Downey Jr.) and his acquaintance with Nathaniel Ayers (Jamie Foxx), a homeless musician of great gifts trapped within a schizophrenia-like illness. Lopez learns Ayers was a cello student at Juilliard 30 years earlier. (Ayers plays several instruments but has no cello when Lopez meets him.) In flashbacks, we see how young Nathaniel began to hear voices and disassociate from reality. One of Lopez's readers donates a cello. When Nathaniel first plays it, director Joe Wright cuts from Ayers' ecstatic face to pigeons gliding over the city, and the film flies, too. L.A.'s violent, drug-fueled Skid Row is a character itself, and many of its denizens are extras. The workaholic writer and homeless musician slowly build a friendship. There are briefly violent scuffles, a bloody crime scene with no body, people using drugs or unconscious from overdoses, occasional profanity, drinking, smoking, and toilet humor. For thoughtful teens.

"17 Again" -- Teen idol Zac Efron will no doubt thrill his fans, but, he lacks the acting skills to play a 37-year-old man zapped back into his 17-year-old body believably. Luckily, the supporting cast adds a lot of zip. We meet 17-year-old Mike (Efron) in 1987, when he walks away from a college basketball scholarship to marry his pregnant girlfriend Scarlett (Allison Miller). Twenty years later, 37-year-old Mike (a shlumpy Matthew Perry) is out of work, moaning about lost opportunities, and living with his oddball pal Ned (funny Thomas Lennon) because Scarlett (now played by Leslie Mann) is divorcing him. A visit to the old high school makes him wish he could be 17 again and a magical janitor (Brian Doyle-Murray) makes it happen. After the initial shock, Mike decides to pose as a student. As he lectures giggly girls on abstinence and tries to flirt with his 30-something wife, the premise seems far more creepy than funny. There is much sexual innuendo, some of it semiexplicit, mild profanity, and condoms passed out in a human sexuality class, though they're not shown. It's implied that some teen characters drink and engage in sexual activity. Not for preteens.

"State of Play" -- This political thriller is two-thirds smart, taut and terrific, but its last act craters under a load of red herrings. The movie sketches political Washington and the shrinking world of old-style newspaper reporting with rat-a-tat repartee and vivid atmospherics. These pay bigger dividends than the actual plot. Russell Crowe plays print reporter Cal McAffrey of the struggling Washington Globe. His editor (Helen Mirren) is desperate for a big story. When a prominent congressman's (Ben Affleck) pretty staffer dies mysteriously, a scandal erupts. Cal, a buddy of the congressman's, tries to report the story and protect his pal. He butts heads with Della (Rachel McAdams) from the paper's online side. The movie has gun violence but shows little blood or graphic wounds. There are dead bodies, a liver on a scale in the morgue, midrange profanity, sexual slang, implied infidelity and promiscuity, drug references, drinking and smoking. News-savvy high-schoolers may like it.

(c) 2009, Washington Post Writers Group.

This news arrived on: 04/30/2009

Share this Story