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Family Film Reviews

Family Film Reviews

Jane Horwitz
"Hannah Montana The Movie" (G, 1 hr., 38 min.)

Teen pop star Hannah Montana's off-stage self, Miley Stewart, gets too big for her high-heeled sneakers in "Hannah Montana The Movie." So her dad, Robby Ray Stewart, decides it's time to take her down a peg by bringing her home to the family's Tennessee farm for a "Hannah detox." Of course, as in the Disney Channel's "Hannah Montana" TV show, the whole thing is a fiction-within-a-fiction. Hannah's "real" off-stage self, Miley Stewart, is played by Miley Cyrus, and Miley Stewart's dad, Robby Ray, is played by her real-life dad, country-and-western star Billy Ray Cyrus. So when the make-believe Robby Ray tells the make-believe Miley it's her turn to do the dishes, well, it's that easy to see them as "just folks." Equally unconvincing is the premise that Miley Stewart's high-school friends never see the resemblance between her and Hannah Montana -- that a wig and makeup are all the disguise she needs. Outside her family, only her best friend knows the truth.

For little girls, however, none of this matters. They get to see Hannah/Miley sing, shop, do elaborate (and pretty labored) slapstick gags, ride a horse, re-connect with her plain-spoken grandmother (Margo Martindale), save her hometown's meadows from a shopping mall developer with a benefit concert, and flirt with Travis (Lucas Till), a local boy she knew when she was little. He lassos a runaway horse for her and has a great grin. There's also a tabloid reporter intent upon exposing Hannah's true identity.

It all starts when Miley, her head turned by too much adulation and an overambitious manager (Vanessa Williams), arrives late at her best friend Lilly's (Emily Osment) sweet 16 party. Forgetting to shed her Hannah costume, Miley causes a near-riot and makes the party all about her. Add to that a public knock-down/drag-out with model Tyra Banks over a pair of designer shoes, and her dad decides to intervene. He tricks Miley into coming home. Miley fusses at first, but learns her lesson.

The Family Filmgoer suggests the movie for kids 8 and older, though many younger girls will enjoy it. They won't get every line, but there is only the mildest of sexual innuendo, and the most brash phrase used is "sweet cheeks." The strongest brew anyone imbibes is iced tea.

Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various ages

-- OK FOR KIDS 8 AND OLDER:

"Hannah Montana The Movie" (NEW) G -- Teen pop star Hannah Montana's off-stage self, Miley Stewart, gets too big for her high-heeled sneakers in "Hannah Montana The Movie." So her dad, Robby Ray Stewart, decides it's time to take her down a peg by bringing her home to the family's Tennessee farm for a "Hannah detox." Hannah's off-stage self, Miley Stewart, is played by Miley Cyrus, and Miley Stewart's dad, Robby Ray, is played by her real-life dad, country-and-western star Billy Ray Cyrus. So it's hard to see them as "just folks." Equally unconvincing is the idea that Miley Stewart's fellow high-schoolers never get the connection between her and Hannah Montana. (Outside the family, only her best friend knows.) But for little girls, none of this matters. They'll get to see Hannah/Miley sing, shop, do elaborate (and labored) slapstick gags, ride a horse, re-connect with her grandmother (Margo Martindale), do a benefit concert to save her hometown's meadows from a developer, and flirt with Travis (Lucas Till), a boy who lassos her runaway horse. It starts when Miley ruins her BFF Lilly's (Emily Osment) sweet 16 party by arriving as Hannah Montana and making it all about her. Toss in a high-profile girl-fight with model Tyra Banks over a pair of shoes, and her dad steps in. There is mild sexual innuendo. The brashest phrase is "sweet cheeks" and the strongest brew is iced tea. OK for under-8s, but they won't get everything.

"Monsters vs. Aliens" PG -- Kids 8 and older ought to have a fine time at this silly, mostly ingenious animated 3-D spoof of 1950s-era "creature features." Apart from a few slow scenes in the middle, the movie fizzes along funnily. Even the "scary" bits are amusing, which will keep younger kids comfortable. There is toilet humor, but nothing too gross. Some under-8s may be spooked when the human heroine Susan (voice of Reese Witherspoon) mutates into a nearly 50-foot-tall version of herself, or when the multi-eyed outer space villain Gallaxhar (Rainn Wilson) clones himself into an army, or when his killer robot (which looks like a huge pickle) attacks. Susan walks too near a just-crashed meteorite and soon after, in the middle of her wedding, morphs into a giant. Government forces abduct her, rename her Ginormica and imprison her with other mutant "monsters": B.O.B. (Seth Rogen), a blob with a big eyeball; the mad scientist Dr. Cockroach (Hugh Laurie); an ape-fish called The Missing Link (Will Arnett), and a huge grub worm, Insectosaurus. Ginormica et al. are sent to fight Gallaxhar. There is a remark about "boobies" and a hint of bare behind. One monster seems to die, but later we learn it's OK.

"Race to Witch Mountain" PG -- There are gun battles, head-slamming fights and chase scenes, all of which could unsettle sensitive kids 8 and younger watching this unexceptional but diverting popcorn flick. The chiseled, good-natured presence of Dwayne Johnson adds a needed center of gravity. Most of the mayhem is loud and fast, but bloodless, though there is a harrowing moment when the protagonists are stuck in a railroad tunnel with a spaceship and a train bearing down. Las Vegas cabbie Jack Bruno (Johnson) picks up teen siblings Sara (AnnaSophia Robb) and Seth (Alexander Ludwig), and later learns that they're alien beings with telekinetic and molecule-scrambling powers. Grudgingly, he helps them flee government types and an assassin from their home planet. Unhelmeted, the alien assassin has a big exposed brain.

-- OK FOR KIDS 10 AND OLDER:

"Alien Trespass" (LIMITED RELEASE) PG -- Nothing in this droll little sci-fi spoof is likely to unsettle most kids 10 and older, unless they're particularly sensitive to UFO/alien monster stories of even the gentlest sort. Those with a wide-ranging sense of humor will probably get the film's wit. In truth, though, "Alien Trespass" aims its satire more at older audiences familiar with those wonderfully cheesy 1950s science-fiction movies, such as "The Blob" (1958). The movie both teases and pays homage to the low-tech special effects, wild overacting, and archetypes in such films. Eric McCormack plays Ted, a tweedy scientist who gets yanked into a just-landed spaceship. He re-emerges possessed by its alien captain, Urp. Ted/Urp wanders through town trying to stop a murderous one-eyed monster with tentacles that escaped the ship. There is mild sexual innuendo, little or no profanity and nonlethal gunplay. The monster gobbles humans (off-camera) leaving just a mud puddle. Ewww!

-- PG-13s OF VARYING INTENSITY:

"Fast & Furious" -- This third sequel in the car-totaling franchise reunites the moody cast of the original film ("The Fast and the Furious," PG-13, 2001). Teens will likely enjoy the ride, and parents may worry they'll might imitate the driving. The acting and dialogue are often unintentionally funny, but the racing stunts can be heart-stopping, with spectacularly staged crashes. At least one pedestrian (albeit a bad guy) gets smashed. The movie has gun violence, explosions and head-banging fights, but no graphic injuries. It contains midrange profanity, a couple of steamy kisses, briefly implied sexual situations, young women in skimpy outfits, drinking and drug references. It also uses tired racial and ethnic stereotypes. Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel), the muscled antihero who races muscle cars, remains a fugitive from justice. After his girlfriend is murdered in Los Angeles, he reconnects with his sister (Jordana Brewster) and her estranged love, FBI agent Brian O'Conner (Paul Walker). The two men team up to avenge the murder and bring down a Mexican drug lord.

"The Haunting in Connecticut" -- Solid acting and handsomely realized effects depicting ghostly visions and visitations make this an effective occult tale despite its repetitive script. (Based on a true story, we're told.) The movie pushes its PG-13 rating, however, with disturbing hallucinatory images of decayed, mutilated and mummified corpses and violent events. There are flashbacks of someone preparing to snip the eyelids off a body, and of seances in which ghostly "ectoplasm" spews from a live person's mouth. The story also deals with a father's alcoholism and potential for violence. Children are threatened. There is occasional profanity. Virginia Madsen plays Sara, whose teenage son Matt (Kyle Gallner) has a life-threatening illness. She moves the family to an old house near the hospital where Matt gets treatment. He immediately starts seeing ghosts. Not for middle-schoolers.

"12 Rounds" -- WWE wrestling star John Cena is an affable, boulder-like presence in this undistinguished crime thriller, built around a series of huge stunts. Cena plays Danny, a New Orleans police detective who has earned the enmity of a vile international weapons-dealing terrorist/thief named Miles (Aidan Gillen). Somehow out of prison, Miles blows up Danny's house and car for starters, then abducts his girlfriend Molly (Ashley Scott) and sets up 12 tasks for Danny to complete or Molly will die. Each involves putting innocents at risk, sometimes fatally. Danny butts heads with the FBI agent (Steve Harris) who wants Miles, too. The film includes explosions, a fairly graphic but bloodless stabbing, gun battles, wild foot and car chases, a woman strapped with explosives, a pedestrian killed by a speeding car, midrange profanity and mild sexual innuendo. More for high-schoolers.

"Knowing" -- This parable about the end of humankind blurs the line between science fiction and theology in a way high-schoolers may find interesting -- the tall, ghostly men in black coats who speak telepathically to children could be space aliens or angels. It's heady, sometimes chilling stuff, but "Knowing" is too often overwrought and silly. In the prologue, a haunted little girl fills a page with numbers and it goes into her school's time capsule. Fifty years later, professor John Koestler (Nicolas Cage), a sad, hard-drinking widower, attends the capsule's reopening. His little boy (Chandler Canterbury) gets the paper with the numbers. John realizes they are dates of disasters past and future. There are quick, intense depictions of the Asian tsunami, hurricane Katrina, 9/11, a plane crash, a derailed subway train mowing people down. We see the injured and dead, but nothing graphic. There is a suicide theme and rare mild profanity.

-- R's:

"Observe and Report" (NEW) -- The tone keeps changing in this dark, nihilistic comedy, and the performance of comic actor Seth Rogen ("Knocked Up," R, 2007, "Pineapple Express," R, 2008) may stun his fans. Writer/director Jody Hill's movie is a very edgy R, which stumbles too often across the line between comedy and tragedy. It contains drug abuse and drinking, steaming profanity, a couple of explicit sexual situations, and prolonged scenes of male frontal nudity in the form of a flasher running through a shopping mall. The mayhem includes fights, a police beating and gun violence. Rogen plays Ronnie, the mall's chief security guard. Stupid, racist, profane, and a bully, he would love to be a real cop and sees the flasher as his ticket, if he can catch him. He also longs to impress the drunk and promiscuous Brandi (Anna Faris), who works at a cosmetics counter. Ronnie gets crossways with police detective Harrison (Ray Liotta), who views him, correctly, as an idiot. Ronnie earns a bit of sympathy as we see him care for his alcoholic mom (Celia Weston) and we learn his history. But he's still a sociopath. Not for under-17s.

"Adventureland" (NEW) -- Strikingly unsentimental, witty and beautifully acted and written, "Adventureland" is a coming-of-age saga geared to adults looking back. It features heavy-duty pot-smoking and drinking, driving under the influence, steaming profanity, crude sexual slang and innuendo, subtly implied sexual situations, and brief comic mayhem. Writer/director Greg Mottola ("Superbad," R, 2007) takes a humane view in which all the young characters, whatever their flaws, have complicated lives. It is 1987. James Brennan, a smart but naive brainiac, has just graduated college. His parents (Wendie Malick and Jack Gilpin) can no longer afford to send him to Europe for the summer, or pay for grad school. A comparative lit major, James has no job skills and winds up working at the local amusement park, run by a penny-pinching couple ("Saturday Night Live's" Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader). James finds kindred spirits there, including Joel (Martin Starr), a nerdy Russian literature freak, and the bewitching Em (Kristen Stewart of "Twilight," PG-13, 2008), who has family issues, drinks too much and dallies with a married man (Ryan Reynolds). James learns he can't intellectualize life. OK for thoughtful high-schoolers 16 and older.

"I Love You, Man" -- Paul Rudd plays Peter, a charming nerd, in this cleverly observed, but crass buddy comedy about a sensitive fellow so devoted to his fiancee (Rashida Jones), and so lacking in macho, regular-guy qualities -- hates sports, can't play poker, tells lame jokes -- that he has no male friends at all. He starts going on guy "dates" to find a friend who can be his best man. He meets Sydney (Jason Segel), a shambling, profane jokester who still acts like the biggest slacker in the frat house, and they hit it off. Whenever the movie threatens to take a pat, cliched route, it almost always veers in a more rewarding, funny direction. It is, however, truly crude. There is strong profanity, very graphic sexual slang, toilet humor, implied marijuana use and drinking. 17 and up.



(c) 2009, Washington Post Writers Group.

This news arrived on: 04/09/2009
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