From the ArcaMax Publishing, Family Film Reviews Newsletter:
http://www.arcamax.com/news/familyfilms/s-478897-387715
"Hotel for Dogs" (PG, 1 hr., 40 min.)
In this illogical but cuddly fantasy, a 16-year-old girl named Andi
(Emma Roberts of "Nancy Drew," PG, 2007; "Aquamarine," PG, 2006; and
"Unfabulous" on Nickelodeon) and her 11-year-old brother Bruce (Jake
T. Austin) fill the hole in their unhappy lives as foster kids by
adopting stray dogs. Set in a sort of grungy Every City, USA, the
story starts with the siblings hiding their soulful, food-stealing
Jack Russell terrier Friday, found as a stray, from their mean foster
parents (Lisa Kudrow and Kevin Dillon). They can't let their kindly
social worker, Bernie (Don Cheadle), know about Friday, either. Bernie
keeps warning them that if they mess up their latest foster home
situation, he might have to place them separately. We never learn how
their parents died, by the way.
Andi and Bruce engage in scams to get money for dog food and have to
dodge police. One day, running from the cops over a crime they
didn't commit, they follow Friday into an abandoned hotel. They
discover two adorable dogs living there. The kids start bringing in
food and caring for them. A nice boy (Johnny Simmons) and girl (Kyla
Pratt), who work at a pet supply store, join in, as does a smart-aleck
local kid (Troy Gentile) who hopes to meet girls this way. Young Bruce
builds ingenious machines that feed, entertain and exercise the
pooches, and deal with their waste needs. The kids turn the place into
a shelter for a delightful array of strays. Of course, the nasty (what
else?) guys from the pound start to wonder what's going on. The whole
tail, er, tale, told in "Hotel for Dogs" is wildly improbable, but
makes for much happily-ever-after fun.
Expect many variations on doggie poop jokes, but also serious themes
about losing parents and flaws in the foster care system, with
glimpses of grim, Dickensian group homes. At the pound, there are
subtle hints that dogs are only held 72 hours before being euthanized.
During a chase scene, the dogs have near-misses with vehicles. There
is one crotch kick delivered by a kid to an adult, and one teen kiss.
"Paul Blart: Mall Cop" (PG, 1 hr., 30 min.)
Comic Kevin James brings a lot of heart to the title role as a
buffoonish shopping-mall security guard who becomes a hero. This
surprisingly amusing family comedy is fine for anyone 10 and older. It
is problematic for under-10s because there are bad guys in it who
repeatedly threaten to shoot hostages.
Heavyset and prone to hypoglycemic fainting spells (that's why he
flunked the state police endurance test), Paul Blart scoots around on
one of those stand-up personal transporters, shyly flirting with the
pretty girl at the hair weave kiosk, Amy (Jayma Mays). Long-divorced,
Paul lives with his mom (Shirley Knight) and teenage daughter Maya
(charming Raini Rodriguez), whose mother, we're told, abandoned the
family long ago. (There's a gratuitous dig at undocumented Latinos in
the account we hear about why Paul's wife left.) Compensating for
career disappointments, Paul takes his mall job very seriously
-- trying to ticket an old man on an electric scooter for speeding.
When a gang of athletic, skateboard-racing robbers invades the mall,
Paul tries to foil them on his own after realizing Amy and eventually
his daughter are among the hostages. Meanwhile, the cops and a SWAT
team assemble outside.
There is some gunfire and an explosion, and Paul and a bad guy fall
through a skylight while fighting. In a comically intended moment, it
is implied that Paul hits a dog while tooling around on his
transporter (nothing shown, but we hear a yelp). When an angry woman
shopper beats Paul up, we see the back of her bra. Paul gets drunk and
acts stupid after mistaking margaritas for lemonade. We see a tattoo
on his partly bare backside, and there is rare mild sexual innuendo
and swearing.
----
Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various
ages
-- OK FOR KIDS 6 AND OLDER:
"The Tale of Despereaux" G -- A big-eared mouse with dreams of
valor saves the day in this charming and richly imagined bit of
old-fashioned animated storytelling. "The Tale of Despereaux" ought to
charm kids 6 and up, but there are bits that could scare littler ones,
such as rats cheering for a cat to eat Despereaux (voice of Matthew
Broderick); he also falls into a dungeon and runs a gantlet of
mousetraps. The film juggles too many characters, and some undergo
dizzying personality changes, but kids can overlook such flaws. In the
medieval Kingdom of Dor, where soup is an obsession, a rat named
Roscuro (Dustin Hoffman) falls into the queen's soup bowl and she dies
of fright. To escape capture, Roscuro dives into the dungeon and joins
gloomy, violent Rat World. Behind a wall in the palace kitchen,
Despereaux is born into Mouse World. He refuses to learn how to scurry
and cower. Banished to the dungeon for meeting with humans, the brave
mouse and Roscuro vow to live heroic lives and are soon tested.
----
-- OK FOR KIDS 8 AND OLDER:
"Hotel for Dogs" (NEW) PG -- In this illogical but very cuddly
urban fantasy for dog lovers, 16-year-old Andi (Emma Roberts) and her
11-year-old brother Bruce (Jake T. Austin) fill the hole in their
lives as unhappy foster kids by secretly adopting a stray Jack Russell
terrier they name Friday. Clever at hiding him from their mean
rock-musician foster folks (Lisa Kudrow and Kevin Dillon), and from
their kindly social worker (Don Cheadle), the kids use illegal scams
to get money for dog food. One day Andi and Bruce follow Friday into
an abandoned hotel. They discover two more dogs living there.
Entranced, they bring in food. A boy (Johnny Simmons) and girl (Kyla
Pratt), who work at a pet supply store, help them, as does a
neighborhood kid (Troy Gentile), who hopes to meet girls. They turn
the place into a shelter for a delightful array of strays, and Bruce
creates ingenious machines to feed, entertain and exercise the dogs.
Soon the nasty guys at the pound start wondering where all the strays
have gone. But never fear -- the kids are smarter. Poop and piddle
jokes are plentiful, and there are serious themes about losing one's
parents and the flawed foster care system. There are fears Andi and
Bruce could be separated and subtle implications that dogs at the
pound are euthanized after three days. One crotch kick is delivered by
a kid to an adult, and there is one teen kiss.
"Bride Wars" PG -- Tween girls may delight in the shimmer of
"Bride Wars," but many a parent will cringe at the stereotype of
females who lust after all things expensive and bridal, while the guys
roll their eyes. The image is ugly, retro, and so tone-deaf for
2009. If the movie were a real hoot, it might be less offensive, but
its wit is more labored than laugh-out-loud. Best friends Liv (Kate
Hudson), a tough lawyer, and Emma (Anne Hathaway), a sweet-natured
schoolteacher, start feuding after the wedding planner (Candice
Bergen) they've both hired schedules their weddings for the same date.
In planning their rival nuptials, no trick is too nasty. It is gently
implied that both career women live with their fiances, and there is a
bachelorette party with male strippers in skimpy outfits and
suggestive dancing. There is much drinking and rare mild profanity.
"Bedtime Stories" PG -- The script is a sloppy mix of sarcasm
and sentimentality and the fantasy sequences look tacky, but "Bedtime
Stories" has the Adam Sandler silliness factor kids 8 and older seem
to like. Sandler plays Skeeter, custodian at a luxury Los Angeles
hotel. The owner (Richard Griffiths) won't promote him and the snide
manager (Guy Pearce) aims to keep it that way. Skeeter's divorced
sister (Courteney Cox) leaves her kids (Laura Ann Kesling and Jonathan
Morgan Heit) with her brother while she flies to a job interview. To
perk up his young charges, he makes up stories and lets them add plot
twists, which start coming true, sort of, in Skeeter's life. The crude
humor includes a tasteless gag about a dwarf. The Heimlich maneuver
revives a seemingly dead man, and a guinea pig with bulging eyes is
creepy. The finale puts kids in pointless danger.
"Marley & Me" PG -- SPOILER ALERT: This pleasant, if
uninspired, adaptation has the same last act as John Grogan's book. We
see a beloved pet grow old and ill, get kissed goodbye and euthanized.
Parents of under-8s (and some older kids) might consider leaving after
an aged Marley recovers miraculously from his first illness. John
Grogan (Owen Wilson) buys a puppy for his wife Jennifer (Jennifer
Aniston) when the newlyweds get jobs as newspaper reporters in
Florida. The cuddly but comically untrainable yellow lab Marley wreaks
havoc before and after the couple start a family. The film shows
Jennifer sad after a failed first pregnancy (a doctor says the fetus
has no heartbeat). There is drinking, mild profanity, gently implied
marital sexual situations and skinny-dipping, and a stabbing victim
who's not badly hurt.
----
-- FINE FOR KIDS 10 AND OLDER:
"Paul Blart: Mall Cop" PG (NEW) -- Comic Kevin James brings
much heart to the title role in this surprisingly amusing little
family comedy about a buffoonish shopping-mall security guard who
becomes a hero. Paul Blart scoots around on one of those stand-up
personal transporters, taking his job very seriously as he watches for
transgressors, and shyly flirts with pretty Amy (Jayma Mays) at the
hair weave kiosk. Paul has hypoglycemia and faints without regular
sugar intakes. Long-divorced, he lives with his mom (Shirley Knight)
and teen daughter Maya (charming Raini Rodriguez). When a gang of
athletic robbers invades the mall and takes hostages, Paul tries to
foil them solo to rescue Amy. PLOT GIVEAWAY: The 10-and-older
recommendation is because the bad guys threaten to kill hostages and
there is some gunfire and an explosion. There is also a quick
implication that Paul hits a dog while on his transporter -- we hear a
yelp. We see the back of a shopper's bra as she beats Paul up. He gets
drunk after mistaking margaritas for lemonade, and we see a tattoo on
his behind. There is mild sexual innuendo and mild swearing. His
daughter is also endangered.
----
-- PG-13s OF VARYING INTENSITY:
"Last Chance Harvey" (NEW) -- With generous, vulnerable,
charming performances as two lonely people who meet by chance and
learn that life hasn't totally passed them by, Dustin Hoffman and Emma
Thompson raise this sentimental tale far above the ordinary. Teens may
find the story a little musty, as it's geared to an older crowd.
Harvey Shine (Hoffman) is a 60-ish jingle-writer with a faltering
career and a hint of a drinking problem. He comes to London to see his
daughter (Liane Balaban) get married and to mingle awkwardly with his
ex-wife (Kathy Baker) and her second family. Kate (Thompson) lives in
London with her busybody mother (Eileen Atkins) and has no social
life. It takes nearly half-an-hour for Harvey and Kate to meet, but
it's worth the wait. There is crude language, mild sexual innuendo and
drinking.
"The Unborn" (NEW) -- An arresting visual style and strong cast
cannot mask the nonsensical narrative at the center of "The Unborn."
Writer-director David S. Goyer tries to lend gravitas to this tale of
a college girl (Odette Yustman) haunted by the spirit of an unborn
child, tying it to Jewish mysticism and -- unforgiveably -- to Nazi
experiments on twins. The mysticism and the history are trivialized
for a dumb scary movie as are the talents of Gary Oldman as a rabbi
who performs an exorcism and Jane Alexander as an old woman who
reveals a secret. There are nightmare images of human embryos, people
and dogs turned into demons, swarming bugs and worms, a needle aimed
at a child's eye, lethal stabbings and fights, and a suicide theme. It
is gently implied that the heroine and her boyfriend (Cam Gigandet)
sleep together. There is midrange profanity and rare crude sexual
slang. Too intense for some middle-schoolers.
"Valkyrie" -- An impossible-to-follow narrative and a miscast
Tom Cruise sink "Valkyrie." Too bad, because high-schoolers might have
found the suspense thriller compelling. It dramatizes a failed 1944
plot by high-ranking members of the German military to assassinate
Adolf Hitler, but the film piles confusion upon confusion in telling
its story. Cruise plays Col. Claus von Stauffenberg, a key
conspirator. Alas, when Cruise's ramrod-straight, eye-patch-wearing
colonel barks, "Hitler is the archenemy of Germany!" the whole thing
slips into parody. There are a couple of intense battle scenes, but
few graphic injuries. We learn after the fact that Von Stauffenberg
has lost a hand and an eye in battle. (He keeps his glass eye in a
silver case.) There are executions by firing squad, a hanging,
suicides, rare profanity, brief mild sexual innuendo and smoking.
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" -- Though nearly three
hours long, this magically spun saga never loses its wonder. In a New
Orleans hospital a dying old woman asks her daughter (Julia Ormond) to
read aloud from an old diary -- that of Benjamin Button (played mostly
by Brad Pitt). The film flashes back to his birth in 1918 as an infant
who looks like an old man. Abandoned by his horrified father at an old
folks' home, Benjamin is raised by the housekeeper (Taraji P. Henson)
and gets younger-looking as he grows up. He goes to sea, discovers sex
(in a brothel), and realizes how fleeting happiness is. He falls in
love with Daisy when they are children, though he looks old. Years
later, their lives (Daisy now played by Cate Blanchett) coincide for a
bit. There are strongly implied nonexplicit sexual situations, partial
nudity, a bad car accident, war deaths, rare profanity, drinking and
smoking. OK for all teens.
----
-- AN R:
"Gran Torino" -- Clint Eastwood, who also directed, lets
himself ham it up in "Gran Torino" as Walt Kowalski, a growling Korean
War vet and retired autoworker who's just lost his wife. He vents
anger, sadness and racist grudges at everyone, especially his new
Asian neighbors, who are Hmong, from Southeast Asia. Yet Walt becomes
his neighbors' vigilante protector after a local gang tries to force
their son (Bee Vang) to steal Walt's vintage car. A formulaic plot,
unpolished acting and tired racial stereotypes damage the film, yet it
still has punch. High-schoolers with patience for character studies
may enjoy it. There are brief bursts of violence, grim threats, and
the sight of a bruised and bloodied young woman who has been raped.
There is a graphic description of killing in war, profanity, racial
slurs, sexual innuendo, drinking and smoking.