From the ArcaMax Publishing, Family Film Reviews Newsletter:
http://www.arcamax.com/news/familyfilms/s-474874-728559
"Bride Wars" (PG, 1 hr., 30 min.)
A little girl of 7 or 8 sitting in The Family Filmgoer's row at a
preview told her dad she thought "Bride Wars" was funny. And in
truth, it does offer plenty of girlfriend humor, pretty things to look
at, and yummy food to salivate over. It should greatly entertain girls
8 to 16. But many parents will surely wince at the movie's wildly
over-the-top stereotype of female lust for things and appearances.
Even more off-putting is the movie's humorously intended implication
that women alone are guilty of this, while boyfriends and husbands
roll their eyes in loving tolerance. This is ugly, retro stuff, and in
these days of economic travails, the whole movie is so 2007.
Even its closing messages about the importance of friendship and
knowing whether your intended mate is right for you seem tacked on. If
"Bride Wars" were really funny, of course, much would be forgiven, but
its attempts at wit are more labored than laugh-out-loud.
Lifelong best friends Liv (Kate Hudson), a hard-nosed lawyer, and Emma
(Anne Hathaway), a sweet but passive schoolteacher, have always
dreamed of June weddings at the Plaza Hotel in New York. Emma's
boyfriend (Chris Pratt) proposes, and Liv, who has already found her
boyfriend's (Steve Howey) hidden Tiffany box, badgers him into
proposing before he'd intended. Bursting with excitement, the two
girlfriends, start planning their separate weddings -- until the very
upscale wedding planner (Candice Bergen) they've both hired mistakenly
schedules their nuptials on the same date at the Plaza. Uh-oh. Neither
Liv nor Emma will blink and take a different date -- Liv because she
always gets what she wants, and Emma because she's decided to grow a
spine. In the blink of an eye they go from pals to enemies as they
plan their dueling events. No dirty trick is too nasty.
"Bride Wars" shows much drinking, including a drunk bride in an
early scene. It is sort of hinted that both women live with their
boyfriends/fiances, and there is sexual innuendo at a bachelorette
party, with male strippers in skimpy outfits and mildly suggestive
moves. There is rare mild profanity and the odd rhymes-with-witch
slur.
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Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various
ages
-- OK FOR KIDS 6 AND OLDER:
"The Tale of Despereaux" G -- A tiny, big-eared mouse with
dreams of valor saves the day in this charming and richly imagined
example of old-fashioned storytelling. "The Tale of Despereaux" ought
to charm kids 6 and up, but there are bits that could scare littler
ones, such as rats cheering for a cat to eat the mouse; he also falls
into a dungeon and runs a gantlet of mousetraps. These scenes all end
safely. The film juggles too many characters, some of whom undergo
dizzying personality changes, but kids can handle those flaws. The
tale unfolds in the medieval Kingdom of Dor, where soup is an
obsession. A ship's rat named Roscuro (voice of Dustin Hoffman) falls
into the queen's soup bowl and the lady dies of fright. Chased by
guards, he dives into the dungeon and lands in dark, violent Rat
World. Behind a wall in the palace kitchen, Despereaux (Matthew
Broderick) is born in fear-focused Mouse World. But Despereaux refuses
to be afraid. Banished to the dungeon for consorting with humans, he
bonds with Roscuro over the idea of valor. Their courage is soon
tested.
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-- OK FOR KIDS 8 AND OLDER:
"Bride Wars" PG (NEW) -- A little girl of about 7 or 8 sitting
down the row from The Family Filmgoer at a preview told her dad "Bride
Wars" was funny, and it's sure to be a frothy tween pleaser. But some
parents will wince at the movie's bizarre stereotype of female lust
for things and appearances, and the implication that women alone are
guilty of this while men roll their eyes in loving tolerance. This is
ugly, retro, and so 2007. Mind you, if "Bride Wars" were really
funny, all would be forgiven, but its attempts at wit are more labored
than laugh-out-loud. Lifelong best friends Liv (Kate Hudson), a
hard-nosed litigator, and Emma (Anne Hathaway), a sweet schoolteacher,
have a falling out after the fancy wedding planner (Candice Bergen)
they've each hired mistakenly schedules their weddings for the same
date at New York's Plaza Hotel. Neither Liv nor Emma will accept a
different date, so they become enemies in planning their nuptials and
no dirty trick is too nasty. The movie shows much drinking, including
a drunk bride in an early scene. It is sort of implied that both
career women live with their fiances, and there is sexual innuendo at
a bachelorette party, with male strippers in skimpy outfits and
suggestive dancing. There is rare mild profanity.
"Bedtime Stories" PG -- The script is a sloppy mix of sarcasm
and sentimentality, and the fantasy sequences are homely and
incoherent, but "Bedtime Stories" has the Adam Sandler silliness
factor that kids 8 and older like. Sandler plays Skeeter, custodian at
a luxury Los Angeles hotel, which began as a motel run by his late
father (Jonathan Pryce). The new owner (Richard Griffiths) won't
promote Skeeter and the conniving manager (Guy Pearce) aims to keep it
that way. Skeeter's divorced sister (Courteney Cox) leaves her two
young kids (Laura Ann Kesling and Jonathan Morgan Heit) with her
brother while she flies to a job interview. To keep his charges
entertained, Skeeter makes up stories and lets the kids add plot
twists, which then start coming true, sort of, in Skeeter's life. The
crude humor includes a tasteless gag about a dwarf. The Heimlich
maneuver revives a seemingly dead man, and a guinea pig with bulging
eyes is creepy. The dumb finale puts child characters in pointless
danger.
"Marley & Me" PG -- SPOILER ALERT: This pleasant, if
uninspired, adaptation has the same last act as John Grogan's book. We
see a beloved pet grow old and ill, be kissed goodbye and euthanized.
Parents of under-8s (and some older kids) might consider leaving after
an aged Marley recovers miraculously from his first illness. Owen
Wilson sidles through his role as John Grogan, who buys a puppy for
his new wife Jennifer (Jennifer Aniston) when they start jobs as
newspaper reporters in Florida. The cuddly but comically untrainable
yellow lab Marley (played by 22 different dogs through the film)
wreaks havoc before and after the couple have kids -- all material for
John's column. The film shows Jennifer sad about a failed pregnancy (a
test shows the fetus has died). There is drinking, mild profanity, dog
poop and neutering gags, gently implied marital sexual situations and
skinny-dipping, and a stabbing victim who's not badly hurt.
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-- PG-13s OF VARYING INTENSITY:
"Valkyrie" -- An impossible-to-follow narrative and a miscast
Tom Cruise sink "Valkyrie." Too bad, because high-schoolers might have
found the story compelling. The suspense thriller dramatizes a failed
1944 plot by high-ranking members of the German military to
assassinate Adolf Hitler, but film piles confusion upon confusion in
explaining the plan and what went wrong. Cruise plays Col. Claus von
Stauffenberg, a key conspirator who places a briefcase bomb beneath
the table in Hitler's bunker. There are pulse-quickening moments, but
whenever Cruise's ramrod-straight, eye-patch-wearing colonel barks
lines such as "Hitler is the archenemy of Germany!" the whole thing
slips into parody. There are a couple of intense battle scenes, but
few graphic injuries. We learn after the fact that Von Stauffenberg
has lost a hand and an eye in a battle. (He keeps his new glass eye in
a silver case.) There are executions by firing squad, a hanging,
suicides, rare profanity, brief mild sexual innuendo and smoking.
"The Spirit" -- Live actors crack wise and fight amid
computer-animated settings in this tiresome comic book adaptation. It
feels like an experiment, not an entertainment. The Spirit (Gabriel
Macht) is a former cop who is unkillable. Clad in black except for a
(computer-generated) scarlet tie, he fights crime under cover of
night. His nemesis is the Octopus (Samuel L. Jackson), a coroner gone
crazy in his lab. In a murky mud flat, the Spirit glimpses jewel thief
Sand Saref (Eva Mendes) who may have been his childhood sweetheart.
Neither poignant flashbacks nor airy allusions to Greek mythology can
breathe life into this dud. There are skull-pounding fights,
off-camera suicides, the vaporization of a kitty, guns and explosions,
profanity and smoking. OK for teens, but dull.
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" -- Though clocking in at
nearly 3 hours, this magically spun yarn never loses its wonder. In a
New Orleans hospital a dying old woman has her daughter (Julia Ormond)
read aloud from an old diary -- that of Benjamin Button. The film
flashes back to 1918, a train station clock that runs backwards, and
the birth of Benjamin (mostly played by Brad Pitt), whose mother dies
in childbirth (bloody sheets shown). The baby looks like a shriveled
old man and his horrified father leaves the infant at an old folks'
home. The housekeeper (Taraji P. Henson) there raises Benjamin, who
gets younger-looking as he grows up. He goes to sea, discovers sex (in
a brothel), and realizes how fleeting happiness is. He meets and falls
in love with Daisy when they are both children, but he looks old.
Years later, their lives (Daisy now played by Cate Blanchett) coincide
for a bit. There are strongly implied nonexplicit sexual situations
and partial nudity, an awful car accident, war deaths, occasional
profanity, drinking and smoking. OK for all teens.
"Yes Man" -- This darkly comic parable has a couple of fine
moments, but too often it resembles a TV sitcom that's trying too hard
to be edgy. Jim Carrey plays Carl, a divorced man so despondent he
says "no" to everything in life. A motivational speaker (Terence
Stamp) gets Carl to commit to saying "yes" to everything. In that
transformative moment Carrey shows a touching mix of tears and joy. He
starts saying "yes" to life, which leads him to meet the lovely
Allison (Zooey Deschanel), but too many "yeses" get him into trouble.
There is drinking, midrange profanity, and a strongly implied sexual
situation involving Carl and an elderly woman that makes the film too
crude for middle-schoolers. There is milder sexual innuendo, a bar
fight and a suicide theme. More for high-schoolers.
"Seven Pounds" -- Teens who are moved by altruism may be drawn
to "Seven Pounds," but they'll have to overlook the syrupy glaze
director Gabriele Muccino ("The Pursuit of Happyness," PG-13, 2006)
slathers over everything. Will Smith, looking desolate, stars as tax
man Ben Thomas, who seems to have a tragedy in his past. He plots to
help people who have problems in their lives and who also owe the
government money -- most especially, Emily (Rosario Dawson), who needs
a heart transplant. The story couldn't be more predictable. There is
rare profanity, a gently implied sexual situation, a strong suicide
theme and nongraphic flashbacks to a fatal car accident. Mature teens.
----
-- R's:
"Gran Torino" (NEW) -- Clint Eastwood, who also directed "Gran
Torino," lets himself ham it up as Walt Kowalski, a growling Korean
War vet and retired autoworker who's just lost his wife. He vents
anger, sadness and racist grudges at all and sundry, especially at his
new Asian neighbors, who are Hmong people, from Southeast Asia. Yet
Walt becomes his neighbors' protector after a local gang tries to
force their quiet teenage son (Bee Vang) to steal Walt's vintage Gran
Torino. He slowly bonds with the boy and his sister (Ahney Her). A
predictable story, unpolished acting and tired racial stereotypes flaw
the movie, yet it has emotional punch. High-schoolers with patience
for character studies may take to it. There are brief bursts of
violence, grim threats, and the sight of a bruised and bloodied young
woman who has been raped. There is a graphic verbal description of
killing in war, profanity, racial slurs, sexual innuendo, signs of
terminal illness, drinking and smoking.
"The Wrestler" (NEW) -- As washed-up wrestler Randy "The Ram"
Robinson, Mickey Rourke is a revelation -- a palooka, a tragic hero
and an innocent all rolled into one. Director Darren Aronofsky and
Rourke tell a dank winter's tale of a man-child. Randy's always broke,
estranged from his grown daughter (Evan Rachel Wood), and in love with
a stripper (Marisa Tomei) who views him as just a favored client. The
downward spiral of Randy's life is all the more moving because he
tries so hard. "The Wrestler" will wow college film buffs and lovers
of great acting. It includes strong profanity, bloody, head-banging
wrestling, self-wounding, cocaine and prescription drug abuse, a
graphic sexual situation, female toplessness and erotic dancing, and
drinking. Not for under-17s.
"Revolutionary Road" (LIMITED RELEASE) -- Leonardo DiCaprio and
Kate Winslet play an ill-matched married couple stuck in a conformist
1950s suburban rut in this emotional roller-coaster drama (based on
Richard Yates' novel). Director Sam Mendes lets things get awfully
stagey, but does elicit arresting performances. Winslet seethes and
suffers as April, who wanted an artistic urban life. DiCaprio seems
almost too callow as the very ordinary Frank. The movie includes an
implied self-induced abortion, explicit sexual situations, marital
infidelity, toplessness, profanity, and much drinking and smoking. For
college-age cinema buffs.
"The Reader" -- Kate Winslet gives a thrillingly risky
performance in "The Reader," a morally ambiguous film that is
gripping, even while rather arid. Hanna (Winslet), a tram conductor in
post-World War II Germany, seduces a teenage boy, Michael (David
Kross) and they have a brief affair. As a law student, Michael is
stunned to see Hanna again, but as a defendant in a war crimes trial.
In middle-age, Michael (played by Ralph Fiennes) records books and
sends the tapes to her in prison. The film seems to hint, bizarrely,
that her illiteracy partly absolves her Nazi past. There are
descriptions of the violent deaths of women and children, a grim visit
to a one-time death camp, a suicide, explicit sex scenes with nudity,
and smoking. Ideal for college students.