From the ArcaMax Publishing, Family Film Reviews Newsletter:
http://www.arcamax.com/news/familyfilms/s-459610-104116
"The Day the Earth Stood Still" (PG-13, 1 hr., 43
min.)
If teens want a chilling sci-fi experience, they should skip this
poorly conceived remake and get ahold of the 1951 original, which
scared many a baby boomer out of his or her bloomin' wits. Good
writing is replaced in the new film with computer-generated effects.
Even seeing this one in its giant-screen IMAX version won't improve
the incomplete script.
In the original film, a spaceship landed on the National Mall in
Washington, D.C., and the humanoid Klaatu (Michael Rennie) emerged,
along with his protector, the robot Gort. Eventually, Klaatu warned
humanity that unless they stopped making war and testing horrendous
new weapons, they would be obliterated in order to keep the universe
at peace. In 1951, with the specter of nuclear war, the movie's stern
warning seemed like a message from the Almighty.
In the remake, the "spaceship" is an enormous glowing sphere, not a
rinky-dink flying saucer thing. It lands not in Washington, but in New
York's Central Park. And Klaatu sheds a kind of gelatinous outer
shell before taking on human form (actor Keanu Reeves). Yet with all
the bells and whistles, this new movie lacks the emotional and
intellectual weight of the original film. There's never a sense that
anything's at stake. Klaatu never really explains whether pollution or
war bothers him the most about humankind.
Princeton biologist Helen Benson (Jennifer Connelly) is commandeered
by the Feds, along with other scientists, to help the government
assess the nature of the invasion. The secretary of defense (Kathy
Bates) is certain Klaatu means harm and is ready to mobilize for war.
Meanwhile, Helen and her stepson (Jaden Smith) spend time with Klaatu,
trying to convince him people are worth saving. The best thing in the
film is the robotic Gort, who's very much like the one in the first
film, but way cooler in the way he can zap with light and sound rays.
The film shows nongraphic images of destruction, but there are also a
few scenes in which people are hurt or killed, with some blood.
There's a graphic surgical incision. A child grieves over a dead
parent. The idea of wiping out humanity, even in a bad film, could
scare preteens.
Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various
ages
-- OK FOR KIDS 6 AND OLDER:
"Bolt" PG -- If it weren't for a very funny hamster, "Bolt"
wouldn't be much of a star in the universe of animated film. It's full
of jokes that kids won't get and packs little emotional punch. Bolt
(voice of John Travolta) is the canine star of a TV series who
believes he's got real superpowers. When he's mistakenly shipped to
New York in a crate, Bolt escapes and meets a smart-aleck street kitty
named Mittens (Susie Essman). As they trek back to Hollywood, Bolt
realizes he's not a superhero. Not until they meet a hamster named
Rhino (Mark Walton), who's a nerdy fan of Bolt's show, does the film
take off. When Rhino is on-screen, "Bolt" is funny and kids stop
fidgeting. Younger kids may worry when Bolt and his little-girl
co-star Penny (voice of Miley Cyrus) are caught in a fire.
"Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa" PG -- This deliciously dizzy
animated sequel has mildly earthy humor aimed at older audiences, but
also plenty of raucous slapstick and wit to delight kids 6 and older.
Alex the lion (voice of Ben Stiller), Marty the zebra (Chris Rock),
Melman the giraffe (David Schwimmer), and Gloria the hippo (Jada
Pinkett Smith) -- along with a passel of penguins -- escaped from the
Central Park Zoo and wound up in Madagascar in the first film. Now
they try to fly home in a rattletrap plane, joined by King Julien
(Sacha Baron Cohen), the dance-crazy Madagascar lemur. They crash into
an African nature preserve, where Alex finds his father, Zuba (the
late Bernie Mac). (In a brief, scary prologue we see how Alex as a cub
was stolen by poachers, who shot Zuba in the ear.) There is mild
sexual innuendo and someone nearly falls into a volcano.
-- OK FOR KIDS 10 AND OLDER:
"Delgo" PG (NEW) -- There's a lot of clever visual imagination
at work in this animated feature from outside Hollywood's mainstream.
"Delgo" is a story of mythic pretensions and can be quite stunning.
But the film may be too violent for under-10s and too storybook for
over-13s. The battles are boring and the jokes as flat as old 7UP, but
the film's color palette and creatures -- from flying dinosaur things
to teeny buzzing critters to a monster that looks like a giant dust
mite -- offer a lot to see. It's just not enough to save the
convoluted story. Set in a distant time, "Delgo" is about two races of
beings, the winged Nohrin and the earthbound Lockni, who have kinetic
powers. The Nohrin and Lockni used to live in peace, but the Nohrin
King's (voice of Louis Gossett Jr.) evil sister (the late Anne
Bancroft) started a war. She was exiled, but is plotting to start a
new war and to take her brother's throne. Unaware of all this are a
clever Lockni teen named Delgo (Freddie Prinze Jr.) and a smart Nohrin
princess, Kyla (Jennifer Love Hewitt). They meet and nearly start a
romance, but grudges they've been taught to hold keep souring the
mood. Yet when violence breaks out and Princess Kyla is abducted,
Delgo and his pal Filo (Chris Kattan) ally with the honorable Nohrin
general Bogardus (Val Kilmer) to save her and stop the war. There are
a couple of implied sword impalements, a poisoning, someone falling to
their death, and a flashback in which little Delgo witnesses the
murder of his parents during the first war -- none of it graphic.
-- PG-13s OF VARYING INTENSITY:
"The Day the Earth Stood Still" (NEW) -- If teens want a
chilling sci-fi experience, they should skip this poorly conceived
remake and get ahold of the 1951 version. Good writing is replaced
here with computer-generated effects. In the original film, a
spaceship landed on the National Mall in Washington, D.C., and the
humanoid Klaatu emerged to warn humanity that unless they stopped
making war they would be obliterated to keep peace in the universe. In
1951, with the Cold War and nuclear weapons testing, the movie seemed
like a message from On High. In the remake, the "spaceship" is an
enormous glowing sphere and it lands in New York's Central Park. Not
humanoid at first, Klaatu sheds a gelatinous outer layer before taking
on the form of actor Keanu Reeves. Yet with all the bells and
whistles, this new version exudes no sense that anything real is at
stake. Jennifer Connelly plays a biologist, Helen Benson, enlisted by
the Feds to assess the alien invasion. The secretary of defense (Kathy
Bates) is ready for war, but Helen and her stepson (Jaden Smith) spend
time with Klaatu, Helen trying to convince him to spare humanity. The
best thing in the film is Klaatu's robot -- part guard, part destroyer
-- who's like the one, Gort, in the first film, but way cooler in the
way it zaps stuff. The film shows nongraphic images of destruction,
but there are also scenes in which people are hurt or killed, with
some blood. There's a graphic surgical incision. A child grieves over
a dead parent. The idea of wiping out humanity could scare preteens.
"Nothing Like the Holidays" (NEW) -- In the tired genre of
films about families driving one another nuts at Christmas, this is a
better-than-average example. Dreary title aside, "Nothing Like The
Holidays" features a wonderful cast of mostly Latino actors and a
script full of cultural -- particularly Puerto Rican -- touch points.
The acting rises above the cliches. Set in Chicago, the movie visits
the Rodriguez clan, led by patriarch Edy (Alfred Molina) and matriarch
Anna (Elizabeth Pena). Their soldier son Jesse (Freddy Rodriguez) is
just back from Iraq and longs to see his ex-girlfriend (Melonie Diaz).
Their lawyer son Mauricio (John Leguizamo) and his financier wife
Sarah (Debra Messing) have no kids yet and Anna wants to know why.
Anna also stuns them all by announcing she plans to divorce Edy.
Mauricio tries to make his parents reconcile. Sarah, the outsider,
tries to bond with her prickly mother-in-law. The film contains
midrange profanity, sexual innuendo, a threat of gang violence, a
fistfight, drinking and implied marijuana use. OK for teens.
"Doubt" (NEW; LIMITED RELEASE) -- High-schoolers who like
stories rich in characters and moral complexity ought to be pulled
right into this atmospheric film. John Patrick Shanley has adapted and
directed his prize-winning play for the screen. There's nary a curse
word or sex scene, but the theme is mature. Meryl Streep plays Sister
Aloysius, a cantankerous, opinionated principal of a Catholic grammar
school in the Bronx, circa 1964. She suspects a new priest, Father
Flynn (Philip Seymour Hoffman), of molesting (though the word is never
used) an altar boy (Joseph Foster), the only African-American child in
the school, under the guise of befriending him. With a naive young nun
(Amy Adams) in her corner, Sister Aloysius confronts the priest, who
denies it utterly. A riveting battle of wills ensues. There is mention
of the boy's father beating him. Priests smoke and drink, and a boy
briefly smokes.
"Transporter 3" -- Jason Statham is still fun to watch as the
grimly macho Frank Martin, a stoic ex-Special Forces type who delivers
packages around Europe for a fee, no questions asked -- unless his
"employers" turn out to be villains. Then he gets 'em. This time Frank
is shanghaied into transporting a mysterious young woman (annoyingly
played by Natalya Rudakova) to Eastern Europe. That ties in with a
Ukrainian environmental minister (Jeroen Krabbe) being blackmailed by
a polluter. The cool chases, stunts and martial arts fights are mostly
nonlethal. We do see people killed by a biohazard, their faces burned.
There are relatively bloodless point-blank shootings, explosions, an
implied sexual situation with partial undress, some sexual language
and innuendo, rare profanity, drinking and drug use. More for
high-schoolers.
"Australia" -- Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman give big, starry
performances to match director Baz Luhrmann's grandly entertaining
film. Woven somberly into the story is the historic mistreatment of
Australian aboriginal people and mixed-race children. Set at the start
of World War II, it is narrated by a half-indigenous/half-white boy
named Nullah (excellent Brandon Walters), who recounts how prissy Lady
Sarah (Kidman) came to Australia from England to find her absent
husband on the cattle ranch he had rashly bought. She learns he's been
murdered, so she fires the ranch's corrupt manager (David Wenham) and
hires a free-spirited cowboy named Drover (Jackman). Sarah and Drover
fall in love, of course. The film shows a man trampled to death, a
bombing raid, rifle and spear killings, children in danger, and a
boy's mother drowning, all nongraphic. There is drinking, smoking, an
implied affair, hints that aboriginal women are sexually abused by
white men, racial slurs and rare profanity. OK for teens.
"Four Christmases" -- It's hard to imagine teen audiences
liking this sour holiday comedy about an insufferable couple forced to
visit families they can't stand, yet it's big at the box office. Brad
(Vince Vaughn) and Kate (Reese Witherspoon) take luxury trips at
Christmas to avoid their families. Children of divorce, they fear
marriage and kids. When their flight is canceled and their parents see
them on a news story about travel delays, they're trapped. Both sets
of parents have remarried, which means four compulsory Christmas
visits -- the worst with Brad's cynical dad (Robert Duvall) and macho
siblings (Jon Favreau and Tim McGraw), then with Kate's mom (Mary
Steenburgen), who makes them play Mary and Joseph in a Christmas play.
Toss in the baby spit-up jokes and "Four Christmases" feels like
eight. There is sexual innuendo, profanity, smoking, drinking,
homophobic humor and a marijuana joke. More for high-schoolers.
"Twilight" -- Teens who love Stephanie Meyer's vampire books
will find much to swoon over in this moody adaptation of the first
novel. The Goth-inspired bloodsuckers strike too many fashion-model
poses and the story verges at times on silliness, but more often
"Twilight" is a poignant, occasionally thrilling meditation on the
struggle between desire and restraint, love and sacrifice. Bella
(Kristen Stewart) moves to a small town to live with her dad (Billy
Burke). She is attracted to her pale, sullen high-school classmate,
Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson), and learns he is a vampire. His
"family" never drinks human blood -- they kill wildlife -- for moral
reasons. Edward fears his feelings for Bella will weaken his
willpower. There is understated sexual innuendo and one ordinary kiss.
A final battle against rogue vampires involves blood, but is more
about gravity-defying martial arts. Other vampire attacks are very
understated.
-- R's:
"Frost/Nixon" (NEW; LIMITED RELEASE) -- High-schoolers who
don't love history and politics may yawn through "Frost/Nixon," though
it's pretty fascinating stuff to Americans of a certain age. Based on
Peter Morgan's hit play, the film examines a famous series of TV
interviews done in 1977 by David Frost with the disgraced former
president, Richard Nixon. Director Ron Howard has filmed Morgan's
script like an upscale docudrama, with secondary characters (played by
Kevin Bacon, Oliver Platt and Sam Rockwell) talking to the camera at
times, as if analyzing the events after the fact. Frost (Michael
Sheen), the slick TV host and playboy, was deemed too much of a
lightweight to get the wily Nixon (Frank Langella, jowly and
deep-voiced, but not mimicking) to admit guilt in the Watergate
scandal, but he did it. The film has strong profanity, brief graphic
footage of Cambodian victims of American bombing, smoking, drinking
and sexual innuendo.
"Punisher: War Zone" -- Ultraviolent, but a pretty good
over-the-top crime thriller for high-schoolers 17 and up who like the
gory genre, this new take on the Marvel Comics vigilante Frank Castle,
aka the Punisher, is not for the queasy. Ray Stevenson plays Castle, a
former FBI agent who's been taking out bad guys extralegally ever
since his wife and kids were killed by the mob. This time he battles a
gangster named Billy (Dominic West), whose face gets sliced up in a
grinder, then monstrously patched. Billy now calls himself Jigsaw.
Then there's Jigsaw's crazy, cannibalistic brother (Doug Hutchison).
There is impalement, spurting blood and an implied beheading, strong
profanity, an ethnic slur, sexual slang, drug use and a child shown
with a gun held to her head. 17 and older.