From the ArcaMax Publishing, Dear Abby Newsletter:
http://www.arcamax.com/news/dearabby/s-641585-199883
DEAR ABBY: Several years ago, I realized that my mother's eyesight and
reflexes weren't what they once were, but she insisted on remaining
behind the wheel. She was afraid of losing her independence if she
gave up driving. Then she had a traffic accident that shook her enough
to make her finally relinquish her keys -- but she wasn't happy about
it.
The solution I came up with was to sell her car, put the money in an
interest-bearing account, and contract with a local cab company to
have a taxi at Mom's assisted-living facility whenever she needed
transportation. Instead of billing her, they would send me an itemized
statement and add a 20 percent gratuity, so Mom wouldn't have to worry
about tipping.
In addition, they also agreed to carry Mother's packages and groceries
to her door, and if she'd be less than a half-hour at her destination,
the cab would wait for her. The company even agreed to use only three
drivers, so Mom could get to know them.
When I visited her for dinner soon after these arrangements were made,
I learned she was the hit of her assisted-living facility! Other
residents told me what a great idea the taxi service was. What I
didn't realize at the time was that Mom was inviting everyone there to
come with her -- her treat -- to department stores, the market, even
the theater. Prior to this, few of them got out at night because of
poor eyesight or fear of being alone.
Using the interest-earning account and realizing the savings of not
having to pay car insurance, upkeep, gas, etc., nobody was out of
pocket. Mother was safe, and she discovered many new friends where she
lived.
While Mom never totally forgave me for selling her car, I know she
enjoyed her new freedom. And I was touched to meet all three of her
taxi drivers when they came to her funeral. -- CARL IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR CARL: You made your mother's transition as painless as it could
possibly be. Congratulations for finding a clever solution to a sticky
problem. No one wants to give up driving and the independence that
goes with it. But at some point, everyone who lives long enough must.
DEAR ABBY: Want another letter for your "Can you top this?"
file? I have one for you.
My wife and I were invited to a 25th wedding anniversary party for my
brother and his wife. We arrived with a gift, as did the other guests.
It was a lovely gathering, and everyone congratulated "Bob and
Mary" on their 25 wedded years.
A little over a year ago, Bob and Mary "separated." Imagine
our family's surprise when Bob revealed that he and Mary had been
divorced eight years earlier! Our family had no idea and neither did
their friends.
Abby, this couple thought they were "entitled" to a 25th
anniversary party and all the presents that go with it -- which they
kept, by the way. Some folks will do anything for gifts, I guess. --
DISILLUSIONED IN VIRGINIA
DEAR DISILLUSIONED: Some people will do almost anything to keep up
appearances. But faking a marriage eight years after the union has
been dissolved is carrying things a bit too far -- and accepting 25th
anniversary gifts for a marriage that's been over for almost a decade
is out of the ballpark.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne
Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear
Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440,
Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets:
"Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "More Favorite Recipes by
Dear Abby." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus
check or money order for $12 (U.S. funds)
to: Dear Abby -- Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL
61054-0447. (Postage is included in price.)
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